marvel women one shots

anxious- y.b

it is currently 4:50 am and i havent slept in 2 days so please ignore any spelling mistakes. I am slowly making my way through the requests. Hope you enjoy the story x

Tony Stark was throwing one of his infamous party's and I was not excited to say the least. I tend to be excited but this time I'm not. In fact I haven't been excited to do anything big for a while. I don't know what it is but when I am involved in big crowds my chest tightens and my breath slows and for a minute it feels like dying. You know the first time it happened was about a year ago, I wanted to cry and scream for help but at the time it felt impossible and a part of me knew that if I did beg for help and someone came they wouldn't be able to do anything anyway. This was my fight to fight and I was going to do it alone. Or so I thought.

Like I said tony was throwing a party (yes again). And I was utterly and totally freaking out. For the past year my panic attacks have been getting worse and I have successfully hidden it from my girlfriend, Yelena. But I couldn't this time.

I'm not even sure what I was stressing about maybe it was the fact everyone could judge me for just being myself or what I wore. Shit what should I wear right lets go through our options. I have a suit I always feel good and confident in a suit but what if they will judge me because I'm a girl in a suit no that's ridiculous. Fuck this is exhausting. Okay the other option is to wear a dress because I guess that fits in to society's 'normality' but I HATE wearing dresses. I hate my body as it is but when a dress hugs my sides and makes all my insecurities stand out it makes it worse.

Okay no this is stupid I shouldn't care what others will think of me I am going to wear the suit. Wait what if Yelena doesn't like me.

My heart is beating a thousand beats per minute and I feel very light headed.

Yelena's POV

y/n said she would be down in 10 minutes she just had to pick out her outfit. That was 40 minutes ago and I have decided to go upstairs and see if she was okay.

I opened our bedroom door to see her passed out on the floor. I ran to her side and put her head in my lap as I asked Jarvis to get Wanda and Nat to come to the room as the AI told me she was okay just needed to wake up.

They came up and looked just as shocked as I did when I came into the room.

Wanda-"what the hell happened up here?"

Me-"I don't know she was like this when I came up a minute ago"

Nat-"JARVIS what happened to y/n"

JARVIS-"it would seem y/n has suffered from a bad panic attack which has resulted in her passing out. She has suffered no injury's and should wake up within a few minutes maximum if not please seek medical help from banner."

Just as the AI finished she started to move around in my lap.

Y/n POV

"what the hell happened" everyone in the room looked around at each other then back at me.

Yelena_"how long have you been having panic attacks love?"

Oh no she knows they all know and the whole focus is on me. This is literally worst case scenario. I didn't want them to know because I didn't want to worry them and now look at me. Led in my girlfriends lap after passing out because off my own thinking.

Wanda-"hun?"

"um a year maybe but they have only recently been getting worse"

Yelena-" why didn't you tell me darling I could've helped you shouldn't of had to go through that alone"

"I didn't want to worry you"

Immediately after I said that I felt a pair of arms captivate me in a long hug. I'm not usually one for hugs but this felt nice. Long overdue.

I guess this whole story is to explain a fear that I should of never made in my head. Reaching out for help does not make you weak or a burden. Addressing the problem is what makes you grow. A lot of the time we find ourselves distracting ourselves from the problem as a solution, however this will not fix anything it just pushes more guilt onto our future self. If you are anything like me please remember that as long as you are doing your best every day you are trying. Doing your best may look different every day sometimes it will just be keeping yourself alive and others it will doing everything on your to do list and that's okay.

Please make sure to look after yourselves and take time to address the issues around us.

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