Songs For The Soul (Jenlisa Oneshots)

Lost Chance

"We should be best friends forever"

"I...Uhmm, okay"

"Best friends forever?"

"Best friends forever."

Before there was me, you and her, or you and her, there was you and I. For every day, I ask myself, if I was brave enough, would it be us who'll end up together? Because I sleep along with that question for decades. That, what if I told you I loved you first, and I love you more than anything. Would you choose me, or look at me the same way you look at her?

Sometimes I thought it could have been us, I was the first person you have. You said I was your favorite, the one you'll pick in any circumstance. The precious friend you'll save from bullies, the heart you oath to protect. All of those you did, was the beginning of never-ending love.

"You're always my Jennie" I remember how I blush every time you claim me mine. And hold my hands after. The sweet smile on your face tells me that it wasn't just an act of kindness. It was out of fondness, and care.

Or maybe I look at it the wrong way, you fixing my hair when I'm napping. Take off your slippers in exchange for my shoes, leaving you barefoot even when it's flooding. Carrying me on your back, because I injured my ankle, or when you ditch other plans just to be with me.

Maybe it's purely because we're friends, because when she came into the picture. Your arms never reached to embrace my shoulders anymore, you place yourself closer to her. You stopped sending me gifts on Heart's day, and my face was forgotten to be the subject of your arts.

"Do you think she will like it?" You look delighted staring at your work. It was her beautiful angelic face on a large canvas, colors splashed highlighting her features. You never did paint this way. I can feel how light the strokes you have, unlike when you did mine that it can almost cut my skin.

"She will" I whispered, you giggled as you drop your brush and carefully covered the art. I roamed my eyes and round just to hurt myself, the room was filled with her beauty, and all of them are worth seeing. At the corner my eyes fell, it was a pile of used canvas. Unconsciously my feet move towards where it was, but meters away I was caught by your hand.

"That's...uhm, those were the paintings I failed to finish." I nodded, she doesn't want to show it. "Your paintings of her are all amazing, what do you mean you failed?" I asked, she shook her head and chuckled, averting her gaze. "It takes a lot of tries to perfect it" I smiled, she did put an effort into this. How lucky she is to be loved by her.

"I'm scared..." You rub your palms together, and your legs tremble underneath. "Calm down, you don't want her to see you all sweaty" I commented, smoothing the edge of her sleeve. She didn't even iron her coat, I shook my head. When I was done I saw her watching me, I was startled by our distance. "Thank you" you murmured.

"No worries" I assured, you uncomfortably shift at your seat from waiting. And all I do is smile whenever you'll glance at me. "Do you think I will do the right thing?" My brows furrowed at you. "Nothing's wrong with asking your girlfriend to be your wife" the last word came out a whisper.

"Do you think it's the right time?" You added, I put down the magazine and face you. "You're the only one who can tell that...you're just nervous Lisa," I uttered. "If she says yes, and we got married. How...how I could I, take care of you-" I didn't know my heart bleeds until today.

Take care of me? She's worried about not taking care of me. "I promised that I'll be with you-, but now I'm...leaving you" I gathered all my strength not to tear up. She still considers me after all, even without knowing that this makes me fall in love with her even more. "I don't want to leave you-"

The chimes cling and we knew she arrived, I left my seat and transferred to another table. I gave my best friend an encouraging smile, but she was looking at me as if I'll be gone. Jihye (No:ze) sat across her and she finally let her sight go from me.

I click the camera button open as I stay behind its lenses. They look good together even in pictures, I captured their moments and waited for Lisa to kneel before her. A tear cascade as the snowdrop from the outside. My hands shake focusing on the point where they kiss. Jihye hugged her and she reciprocated back, Lisa glimpse sideways, a small smile appeared on my lips.

"Your wedding will be perfect" the wedding designer complimented. The both of us look at each other, I laugh. "I'm not the bride," I said, making the designer gasp. "I'm sorry, I thought you're the couple-" she bowed "It's okay" I replied, I notice Lisa spacing out.

"Are you okay?" I worriedly ask. Since we came here to the shop her mind is off to somewhere. I rested my hands on the top of her knee, surprising her. She must be thinking about Jihye, her fiance is in a business drip. "I'm good" when I heard that I was relieved.

"Your wedding is tomorrow" I stated, reading down the list of their guests. I was helping her throughout the preparation. And to be honest, it was painful yet I find happiness in it. "Hmm" she shortly hummed. I turned to her confused, "You're acting strange..." Lisa sighed. "I need to show you something"

I have a lot to ask when we went to her studio, it's where she exhibited her works. We entered the room solely dedicated to her fiancé, do you need to hurt me this much? "What are we-" I didn't finish when she opened another door, it leads us to a new room.

My hand went to cover my mouth, the walls were decorated with paintings of me. From the first to the last one, it was dated. "I couldn't keep it any longer, I think it would not let me at peace if I wouldn't tell you the truth. We were young when I learned I love you. And I was afraid to admit it, having you as my best friend means I'll have you forever. I taught myself to forget you, to try loving someone else. Even though it was painful that you can't be mine, I accepted it.

Because we promised to just be best friends forever."

We both lost our chance of having of forever.