shutterbug ~ johnten

twenty

"a-ah- fuck-" ten whined, letting out a cry of pleasure as the latter held his body against the wall.

thoughts ran through his head. johnny. jaehyun. love. sex. lust. romance. anger. jealousy.

he felt nothing except fake romance and the man's fingers digging into his waist.

he felt horrible. he didnt know why he did this, but he felt like he needed to, for some kind of escape.

they reached their climax together, falling down and onto the bed with sighs and grunts. ten had tears in his eyes, but the latter thought they were simply from pleasure.

he'd never felt this low. ever.

-

once again, after escorting the man out of the building, he found himself laid in a lukewarm bath, his forehead sweaty as he stared into the city out of his small window.

he wanted to text johnny. he wanted him to come over, he really wanted help. he just wanted to be in his arms.

but he was scared the boy would hate him. it wasn't really cheating if the two weren't dating, however he still felt super bad about it, and was dreading having to admit everything.

he didnt want to make johnny feel as worthless as he already did. he'd already been cheated on once, and he didnt want it again.

ten sobbed, letting out small wails as he threw his head back, staring up at the ceiling. he wished he could sleep for years, then wake up and restart. he couldn't cope anymore.

-

ten: help please

johnny: are you okay? need me to come over? what do you need

ten: please come

ten: i can t take it anymore.

johnny: i'll be there in 10, need me to call you?

ten: yes please.

-

"hey."

johnny's heart dropped as he heard ten's sobbing.

"i'm sorry."

"huh? for what?"

"i- i dont- i -"

"okay.. shh.. you can explain when i'm there.."

"please dont- i'm in the bath- please dont judg-"

"ten.. shh.. take a deep breath alright? i'll be there in a second.."

"you h-have a key r-right?"

"i do, my love.. try to breathe okay? you're in the bath? is the bathroom door unlocked?"

"mhm...."

"i'm pulling up outside now, alright? the front door's locked?"

"yeah.. sorry."

"it's okay! i have a key, love."

ten took a deep breath, as he heard johnny open the door. the call ended as johnny opened his bathroom door slowly to see ten laid, shaking slightly in- now cold- water.

his heart dropped as ten's lip quivered, and he attempted to cover his body.

"come here-" johnny grabbed one of the boy's towels, opening his arms for ten to climb into. he looked away, giving the boy as much privacy as he could as he struggled to get out of the bath.

his legs were shaking, as he stumbled out of the tub, and into johnny's embrace, being wrapped with the warm towel.

he still shook slightly, as johnny wrapped his arms around him completely, warming him up. lifting the boy, cradling him like a baby, johnny turned emptied the bath, before walking out of the bathroom and into the bedroom.

"c-cold.."

"i know," johnny nodded, climbing into ten's bed and laying, pulling the younger into his chest. feeling ten so fragile and vulnerable like this made johnny want to cry. he held him as close as he could, kissing his head and rubbing his sides, "need anything?"

"c-clothes.." ten stammered, wrapping his arms around johnny's neck, "i'm s-so cold."

nodding, johnny slid out from underneath ten, wrapping him with the blankets as he walked towards his clothing drawers, "anything?"

"warm."

"mhm.." johnny nodded, grabbing the boy underwear, a hoodie and joggers. he shut the windows whilst doing so, before passing ten the clothes, "need help? or want me to leave?"

"i d-dont care, you can stay," ten nodded, quickly putting on as many layers as he could. johnny took off his shoes, frowning as he saw ten wiping his eyes, not being able to stop tears from falling, "come.."

johnny nodded, joining ten in his bed and feeling the boy snuggle up to him, relaxing his body like it was all he had left. he could feel how weak ten felt, as he still shook slightly.

"johnny i-im sorry."

"do you wanna talk about it? what happened?" johnny asked, genuinely still confused about the whole situation, but happy that he had him safe in his arms, "i'm here, okay? i've got you."

"i ha- i had sex.. with that guy again-" ten stuttered, more tears falling as johnny kept his lips on his head, rubbing his back, "i didnt m-mean to.. im s-sorry-"

"hey! hey, ten... it's okay.." johnny sat up, keeping the latter secure in his hold, but trying to help him sit up so he could breathe easier, "why are you apologising..."

"b-because... you..." ten whimpered, his voice breaking as he looked up at the older. johnny shook his head, holding ten's cheeks, "i like... you... not him. i d-dont know why i had to- i-"

johnny pressed the boy into his chest, massaging his head to calm him down.

"it's fine, ten.." johnny whispered, trying to hold his own tears, as seeing ten like this made him want to cry, "im proud of how far you got... i have you now, i'm gonna help you."

ten nodded, trying to settle his breathing, "but- i feel shitty- because, y'know, you..."

"mhm.. ten i'm okay.." johnny reassured, as ten shivered, trying to get comfortable, "i promise you, alright? i'm here to help you."

ten nodded, kissing johnny's chest gently for some sense of safety and closure, "p-please help me."

johnny nodded, lifting up the boy's head, "what do you wanna do? right now? we could sleep? or do you want to shower? are you hung-"

"too many questions," ten chuckled sadly, yawning, "c-can we order food?"

johnny nodded, grabbing his phone, "you're feeling a little better?"

"no.." ten took a deep breath, but laughed softly, "i'm okay. thank you for coming."

a/n hi . drama !!!