The Drug In Me (Ronnie Radke Love Story)

READ THE SEPARATE BOOK

****sorry....don't die or kill me****

I was wrapped in Ronnie's arms asleep when Spencer and Hotchner came knocking on the door to the bus. And I was still sleeping when a groggy Ryan walked down the hall in his pajamas and opened the door for them.

But when they woke me up and I heard what they had to say, I felt like I could never sleep again.

"We've got no progress on cracking John. He's a very collected, manipulative person. Common among sociopaths, but he is exceptionally difficult" Hotchner said, looking to Spencer to finish. "Most sociopaths like John have their own tic, the one thing that makes them vulnerable" Spencer explained to me, and they looked at me like they were about to tell me something catastrophic like someone I loved died or I had some deadly disease.

"Ok, so? John's the least vulnerable person ever. I don't know his 'tic'. And what does this have to do with me?" I asked, grabbing Ronnie's hand and holding it tightly.

What were they going to say? What were they going to ask of me?

"Well, that's just it, it has everything to do with you" Spencer said, and I looked at him confused. "I can't help you find out his tic, I'm sorry" I said, biting my lip and shaking.

I was getting flashbacks again. The dirt staying under my fingernails, the dust clouding my eyes, the cuts throbbing, blood seeping out and soaking into the ground. The lonely silence, no sound except when He came driving up and yelling at me. The pain of His words, the pain of His hits, the pain of Him.

"Actually, you're the only person that can help. And you don't have to find his tic, we know what his tic is" Spencer said, and I shook my head, confused. If they knew his tic then why did they need me?

"You are his tic" Hotchner said finally, and I froze. "W-what?" I said, terrified. What did they mean, I was His tic? And what did they want me to do?

I couldn't be His tic. That would mean I make Him vulnerable, and He was anything vulnerable, especially when He was with me. So how could this be?

"Ryker, we have to ask you to come in with us. You don't even have to talk to him, just come in the room and that should be enough to make him lose his cool" Hotchner said, looking at me apologetically.

I shook my head, burrowing deeper and deeper into Ronnie's side. "Can't you just show him a picture or talk about her? She can't see him again" Ronnie asked, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and holding me closer.

"I'm sorry, but this is the only way. Just see him one more time and then it'll be over forever" Hotchner said, but I couldn't do it. I stood up and walked around the room, hiding my face in my hands, crying.

They tried to talk me into it, but I couldn't say yes. This was too much. I couldn't do it, I couldn't handle it. I couldn't handle it at all. I would die if I had to see Him again.

His glare would kill me, and if not, then He would. He'd jump up so fast no one would be able to stop Him, and His hands would wrap around my neck in a vise grip and strangle me, and no one would be able to do anything. They could kill Him and they still wouldn't be able to get His hands from my neck, and Id turn blue, gasping for air, but I wouldn't get any and then I would die. I would die.

"If you don't do this, he could be released. The agency isn't acknowledging our evidence based on your claims as sufficient to put John in jail for a long time. If you do this, I promise you he will snap and spill everything. And then you'll be safe from him for the rest of your life" Spencer said, and I finally sat back down, thinking deeply.

If I did this, it would be horrifying, but it would be the end. I would finally be free forever of Him. But could I really handle seeing Him again? I don't think I could, but I was going to have to.

I agreed, and they led me to the car, talking to me, assuring me that I would be safe. We got in the car, and I held Ronnie's hand so tight I thought I might permanently damage his circulation. But he didn't complain, he just squeezed my hand back and smiled at me comfortingly. He promised that he would be there for me.

"Ronnie can't come in the room, but Morgan and I will be there, and if you want, JJ or-" Hotchner started to say, but I interrupted him, saying "I want Spencer to be with me". Spencer looked at me in surprise, but he nodded.

I would face Him, but I would have Spencer, Morgan and Hotchner with me.

We got to the police station and walked inside, just to see Morgan come storming up to us. "They've gone and released him!" he said angrily to Hotchner, and then they rushed over to a stern looking women in a pantsuit, an ugly frown on her face.

R-released? He was released? He was f-free? W-why would they release Him?

I lifted my eyes to see Him brush past me, a smirk on His face, and eyes that screamed 'you'll pay for this, but I've got the best of you yet again'.