The Equivalents

51. Scars Part 2.

After a couple days, Peter's healing ability kicked in and he was starting to feel much better. His metabolism was also working hard as well. He felt like eating a horse.

Sam went into the kitchen to get a drink and was shocked to find five pop tarts, a pan full of Kraft macaroni and cheese, three hot dogs, a variety of sandwiches, pizza, and a small salad for health on the kitchen island. Peter didn't seem to notice him come in and just kept pouring his drink.

"You making dinner or something?" Sam asked. "Cause no one expects you to cook for them right now."

"Ugh, this is actually all for me." Peter laughed. "Powers are back online and my stomach has been screaming at me."

Sam laughed. "And you're going to eat all of that?" He asked.

"You're right. I should make more." Peter nodded. Sam mentally face palmed.

"Why don't you start with this and see how you feel from there?" Sam sighed.

"Alright." Peter sighed as well. In his mind, it would save time to just make all the food up front. Then he wouldn't have to come in twice, do the dishes twice, and then clean twice. But on the other hand, it also meant he would risk the chance of eating cold food, which is rarely ever good. So maybe Sam was actually right about this one.

Before he knew it, Peter felt his spidey sense tingling. Sam noticed him tense and asked what was wrong.

"You alright?" Sam asked.

"My spider sense is going off." Peter explained.

A second later, the lightbulb in the kitchen exploded, and darkness took over the room.

"That wasn't quite what I was expecting." Sam tilted his head up.

"W-What happened?" Peter stuttered.

"Someone probably put the wrong size light bulb in." Sam explained.

"Oh." Peter said. His hands started shaking and his heart beat got faster.

"You sure you're alright?" Sam questioned.

"I just... it's complicated." Peter sighed. "Do you have a flashlight or something?"

Sam pulled his phone out and turned on the flashlight. Peter relaxed once he saw the light. It brought him comfort. It reminded him that he didn't have to give into the darkness. That there was always light. He just had to look for it.

"Are you scared of the dark all of a sudden?" Sam asked.

"I..." Peter's heart was racing, his hands were shaking, and he couldn't breathe. "I didn't want to... I-I had to make it stop... I had to give in..."

"What are you talking about, kid?" Sam questioned. "It's alright, just spit it out."

"Goblin... he made me give in to my darkness. I can't believe I gave in. I tried to kill them. I could've... I almost." Peter almost collapsed, but Sam caught him in time.

A minute later, the emergency lights came on and Sam relaxed a little. He thought since the lights were on, Peter would be alright. But he wasn't. Sam looked over and saw Peter was sitting up against the wall. He went over and sat by him.

"It's over. We're alive. We're safe." Peter whispered. "So why can I still feel it?"

"This kinda stuff doesn't just leave people." Sam replied.

"I know that. I know that trauma never really goes away. You just try and keep yourself from bringing it up to the surface again." He paused. "But this... I can feel it. I can still feel it. Physically. Like I'm still there. Like it's still happening. I can still feel 30 to 50 volts going through me. At least on a good day. I can still taste blood on my lips. Smell the scent of smoke from the machine. Just like the first time."

Sam wrapped his arm around Peter's shoulders. "It's alright kid. You were strong. You made it through."

"I didn't." Peter admitted. "I snapped. He broke me. I craved the darkness because I thought it would make it all stop. He gave me an opportunity. To join him. To be the heir of the Goblin name. All I had to do was..."

"Was what?" Sam asked.

"Kill Bucky and Jason." Peter mumbled, hoping Sam wouldn't hear it. But he did.

"You obviously didn't. No one's gonna blame you." Sam said.

"I will." He whispered.

"Look. I don't know what happened to you guys, but I know it was bad. If you think that any of us wouldn't have snapped too, then you're delusional. You probably still lasted longer then most of us would've." Sam explained. "If you don't want to tell anyone, I understand. But don't blame yourself. They're both still alive, so obviously you came through in the end. You're a hero. You save people. You don't hurt them. That's not you. The kid I'm looking at is one of the best men I know. And I know a lot of people."

Peter smiled a little bit. "Thanks. I just... I don't know what to do now. I have a million thoughts running through my head... I wish I could just pick one."

"Well, since I'm obviously not as pure of a hero as you, the first thing that comes to my mind is revenge." Sam joked.

Peter laughed. "Not revenge. Justice. Not just for me, for Gwen. He needs to be locked up, so she can be at rest."

"That's really sweet." Sam nodded. "So let's get back to work and make it happen."