Tween Idle

October 1, 1998

Dear diary,

Tonight was opening night. And I hated every second of it. Call time was at 6, and the play started at 7. Everyone in the cast HATED me. And without May, I was alone. I just wanted to go home and cry in my pillow. I was trying so hard not to cry backstage. Then suddenly, the lights dimmed. The audience went quiet and the curtain opened. I didnt even wanna be in the play anymore. I didnt care anymore, cuse I was gonna be backstage for most of the thing anyway. But for some reason my mom still came to see me, even though Im only in it for like a minute.

5 minutes before I went on stage I put on the stupid tree costume. Then it was my turn to go on stage. It was hard to move around in the costume. And as soon as I was on stage, tears began to well up in my eyes. Then Matthew said his line. "God, I know you can hear me. The girl of my dreams is the one my father dosent approve of. God, give me a sign. Anything! What am I to doth?" he said. "You must...follow...thy heart" I said in tears. "What on earth?" said Matthew. And then I had to stand there while the other trees said their lines. I looked around in the audience and saw my mom. AND GUESS WHO ELSE WAS IN THE FREAKING AUDIENCE? MAY!! Even if she hated me, she still came to see me. "Thee never seen a talking tree before?" said another girl who was playing a tree. "Thee all talk?" said Matthew. "We always hast" said a boy who was playing a tree. Then Matthew ran out of the "forest" screaming. And that was it. That was my line. That was the only time I was on stage.

I took my costume off (I had a black shirt, black leggings and sneakers underneath) and sat backstage for like an hour, waiting for the play to end. Then I had an idea. What if I went out there and exposed Sugar for who she realy is? Cuse everyone loves her and thinks she's SO nice. She acts especialy nice in front of teachers. Thats when I heard Matthew say "If I cant have thee I'll hast nobody else" and Sugar say "Thee hast nobody else but me" which was the last scene in the play. Which meant this was when they had to kiss. But when they were about to kiss, I ran out on stage and yelled "STOP THE SHOW!!" Matthew looked confused and Sugar had an angry look on her face. And then I did a little speech.

"Im Electra Heart, and I have something to say. This girl right here is Sugar, and she's a B*TCH!! SHE AND HER FRIENDS BULLY ME LIKE EVERYDAY! But when she's being Julie no one notices cuse thats how acting works or whatever. AND THATS WHY I CAME OUT HERE. TO EXPOSE HER FOR WHO SHE REALY IS. YOU ALL ARE BLIND, I TELL YOU. BLIND! YOURE BLINDLY FOLLOWING HER! AND IM SICK OF SEEING PEOPLE BLINDLY FOLLOW HER ACTING LIKE SHE'S ALL THAT. BECAUSE SHE'S NOT ALL THAT! Thats all I have to say." I said. The entire audience was silent. And thats when I walked off stage, feeling proud of myself. When I was about to leave the auditorium, I looked back and saw that the show had went on. Matthew and Sugar kissed, the curtains closed and everyone clapped. Tears began to well up in my eyes, and so I left the auditorium. Then I left the building and walked home. I dont wanna be in this stupid play anymore. I dont care about Matthew anymore. I just want my friend back.