Tween Idle

September 21, 1998

Dear diary,

Today at school I wore a black dress and mary janes. I put eyeliner on my eyes and lips like I did yesterday, and then I smeared mascara to make it look like I was crying. As soon as I got to school and May saw me, she asked "You okay?" "What do you think" I said. "Listen, if this is about the pool party, you deserve way better than him-" she said. But I interuppted her. "I dont wanna talk about the pool party" I said. "Im sorry, I hope you feel better soon" she said. "Feel better? Im not gonna feel better, May. This is who I am, and youre just gonna have to learn to deal with it." I said. Then the bell rang and I went to class.

In math, my teacher (Mrs. Daniels) was shading in shapes cuse we were learning about adding composite shapes or whatever. "Alright, now which color should I use?" she asked. "Black, like my soul" I said. Then in art class, we were learning how to draw 3D. And so I drew a 3D broken heart and wrote "LOVE IS EVOL" above it. I colored it black.

Later during rehearsel, Sugar was chewing pink bubblegum. She ALWAYS chews pink bubblegum. I was sitting in the audience next to May. As Sugar and her friends walked past me, she said "Who died?" "Your mom" I said. "Yours wanted to when she found out the condom broke" she said as she and her friends laughed. I was sick and tired of her bullsh*t. And so I stood up and yelled "I HOPE YOU CHOKE ON THAT GUM YOU BUBBLEGUM B*TCH" Thats what Im gonna call her from now on. Bubblegum b*tch!

After rehearsel, I realized I didnt wanna emo anymore. Instead Im gonna be a homewrecker. I'll show Matthew what he's missing! And thats why Im gonna start looking, dressing and acting like Sugar. But I'll do it better. I'll show him Im better than bubblegum b*tch! Im gonna be his Sugar Pink, cuse thats what young love is all about. Im gonna be his bubblegum b*tch!