《~How did we get here?~》 (Ranboo x reader)

Goodbye...

Tw: Swearing 

Y/n POV 

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT. SHIT. UGHHH SHIT. WHY DID I SAY 'I love you too' WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME? I DONT LIKE HIM IN THAT WAY AT ALL. NOW WHAT? AND HE KISSSED ME? LIKE EW I SEE HIM AS MY FUCKING BROTHER. WHAT NOW?

What if I hurt him by saying no? Will he come to say goodbye? Will he still feel the same way about me if I come to visit? Wait, DO I like him back? I have so many questions. I should be asleep...  but HE KISSED ME. The kiss didnt feel right at all. I always thought that if you kiss someone you love it would be perfect? Now, dont get me wrong- I love Tommy- BUT AS A FRIEND-!

Nothing more nothing less. I mean, I dont have any other friends since my parents have just always let me do online school. I really dont know what to do. I mean, if I did like him back I would try the long distance thing but I dont feel the same way! I just dont. I wonder if hes mad that I turned him down. I feel bad.

Should I feel bad? I really dont know what to do. 

~~~Time skip~~~

As I hear my alarm beep I want to go back to sleep. When I'm asleep atleast theres no problems. I stayed up till 3:03 and now its 4:30. I don't wanna miss my plane. I cant believe that we are really just going to leave like that. Maybe I do wanna miss my plane.

I dont know. My head is so filled with thoughts I dont know what to do. 
       I was interrupted when I heard my mom say: "Breakfast hun! Dont wanna be hungry when we get there!" I sigh. Here we go. I put on some comfortable clothes and went down stairs. It was my last morning here. Wow. My mom had made pancakes. "Your favorite honey!"

She says with a smile. "Thanks mom," I mumble. We finish up quickly most of the shit in our house had already been moved to Florida. "By the way honey, did you say goodbye to Tommy yesterday?" She asks. "Yea but hes going to come say goodbye before our flight." I say. "Oh... uhm honey... Tommy sent me a text saying he wouldnt make it." She said.

"What?! But I was depending on him!" I say a little irritated. "I'll call him." I say heading out to the chilly air. "Dont be long honey we have to leave in 15 minutes!"  "OK!" I yell already outside. I call Tommy's phone and he doesn't answer. So I left a message. "Hey tommy, you promised me that you'd come and say goodbye at the airport?

I wanted to say goodbye man, I'm going to miss you y'know. If this is about last night I'm sorry-" then my mom yells "HONEY GET IN THE CAR WE CANT BE LATE!"  " Tommy, I'll call you when we land, and you'd better have a fucking good explanation to why you weren't here. Cya." I say hanging up then running to the car. I get in and fall asleep on the way to the airport wondering why tommy said he wasnt coming. I really hope this wasnt about last night.

~~~

   We get there 15 minutes before our flight. I wanted food but my parents wouldnt let me out of there sight incase I got lost and we miss our flight. Right as we were boreding the plane I get a text message from tommy. When I read it my heart drops. 

    "Hi Y/n! I'm sorry I couldn't make it- I didnt want to be a bother. I got your call and listened to the voice message, and it was kinda about last night that I didn't come. I can't face you again, knowing I'll never be able to have you. Of course, I would never say this to your face but I want you to know. Dont bother replying I'll have blocked you. I think this is the best for the both of us. Y/n, i want you to find someone where you move, that's going to be there for you while I would be 15,000 miles away. Promise me you'll find new friends, they'll love you. I also decided to take your advice on some things. I'm going to focus on being a streamer. I am excited about that. Y/n, I love you more then you'll ever know. I think if we got together it could have ended up being really good, but all good things come to an end- don't they? I'll always love you, and remember your promise to me, that you'll never forget me? I love you Y/n. I know you feel the same about me but this is for the best. Goodbye Y/n, remember me. Have a nice life." 

And that was the end. I was in shock. He wanted nothing to do with me. I was glad he was going to focus on streaming and being a youtuber, but I never expected this. I always thought we would be best friends. And now... hes gone...

      As we took off a few tears fell down my face. I pretended it was from the air pressure. When I thought I was leaving Tommy, i never thought it would be like this.

✨ aUtHeRs nOTe✨

🥺🥺🥺🥺💔💔💔💔

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