"She needs the surgery, now. Her condition is extremely risky," the doctor says worriedly.
"Do it," Mother says.
"You're completely sure, madam?"
"Yes," Mother replies.
"No, wait! You can't decide that on your own! That's not fair. He's saying it's a risky surgery, what if I-"
I bury my face in my hands, trembling. I look at them, but they don't look at me. They don't realize that I'm there. I call out her name over and over. And when I'm about to scream, I practically jump forward, landing on my knees, pulling on the hem of her blazer.
"Mom, please. Don't do this to me. Please, wait. I'm not ready. What if I don't make it through the surgery?"
"One less thing to care about," Mother says coldly, prying my hands off of her and looking at me with disgust.
"Wait, please!" I scream. The unimaginable happens. I fall. I'm on the ground, but I'm falling. Falling into nothing, into pitch black darkness. And Mother is still standing on the white-tiled ground.
Looking down at me as I fall, not a spark of feeling changing in her face. Just pure disgust. Even as I scream and scream and scream. I scream my lungs out. No words, only the most piercing, raging, gut-wrenching scream.
Even as dark red blood shoots out of my mouth, I continue to scream. It runs down my chin and neck, as I continue to scream. No sound comes out because my vocal cords have been ripped. I've lost my voice, all I can taste is the iron of my own blood. I wipe it away and stain my hands with a crime I've committed against myself, but it keeps coming out.
She doesn't care. She turns her head toward the doctor. That's when I give up, and I let go.
I instantly rise from my sheets.
It was a dream. It was a dream. It was a dream, I tell myself. A dreaded nightmare. Nothing more. I put my hand to my mouth, not wanting to cause any noise while the other hand runs through my hair shakily. I didn't scream, thank god.
My eyes are still wide open like in the dream. My breath is steadying its pace while my knees rise to my chest. Tears flood my eyes, on their own. I woke up with them.
It's a dream, it's not real. I'll be fine. There's no need to overreact. I'm fine. I look at the clock.
It reads '9:27 a.m. Tuesday, March 19th.' It's the day of the dreaded appointment with the specialist. Partially glad I'm missing school, I stand and get ready for the day.
I brush my teeth, tie my hair back, and wear appropriate attire.
I go downstairs to see Father eating his food. Mother isn't there, though. I take my morning pills after greeting him, feeling shaken. I don't know what would've happened if I saw her, especially after that nightmare.
"Where's Mother?" I say while taking a seat.
"She had to go to an advertisement meeting," he says bluntly.
"Shouldn't you be there too?"
"My assistant's taking my place. I need to be free of all work plans for your appointment."
My father is the head of a huge technology company. Mother works there too. This same company is my family's. Father inherited it from my grandfather, and I'm the last heir who has to take it on next. My fate is decided.
Even though he's always out on trips and working, he tries to make time for me when he can. Unlike Mother, my father is more sympathetic and emotional. He tries. He's not a hard shell.
YOU ARE READING
Lavender | Wakatoshi Ushijima
Fanfiction'Everything seems to wash away with the tide and it's just two naïve kids staring at each other again, making promises to a future that isn't promised. A world they haven't seen, a life they haven't lived. A journey that's uncertain except for these...
