Something feels wrong. Something in that instinctive gut of his echoes that something isn't right. Something is off, wrong. And it scares him. Could he be running to find something wrong with her? Is she all right? He doesn't know because of that nagging feeling yelling otherwise. So, he runs faster. He remembers her uncustomary condition at school, so he runs even faster.
He turns at the curb, reaching their usual route. He continues running.
The cold air cools him off, trying to force the anxiety away.
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Tendo waves Hayato goodbye before closing the door and sitting on the couch again. Ushijima had left around five minutes ago. He didn't talk to them, only dashing out the door. Partially humiliated and guilty, he picks up his phone.
Kiyomi, change of plans.
What? Why?
Hayato and I tried to talk to him, but he blew up. He left the dorm a few minutes ago. He might be going out for a run, but I think he's heading to Hana's place.
How does that affect what we agreed on? I'm slow.
He's probably going to talk to her face-to-face.
That's also great. I hope it goes well.
Me too.
Although, I'm still going to talk to her alone. She's being too quiet and I have free time the day before we leave. Coach is letting me off since you'll be practicing.
Today's his last chance. We're going to be booked.
He better not blow it. You have the tournament around the corner.
Exactly.
Let me know how it goes.
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Ushijima keeps running, his breath white in the crisp air.
He knows he's unlovable. He's always known that. Someone so stoic, so quiet, so tall and emotionless, how could she love him? A lump of muscles and hidden emotions.
If she has that intelligence, that breathtaking beauty, why would she love someone who needs her help? Why would she love a burden? Why would she care for such a scarred person?
He runs through the same cycle of thoughts over and over.
"Maybe that's why you haven't gone to talk to her yet, because you don't believe that she's in love with you."
He doesn't know, but he wants an answer. He wants to talk to her. He wants the knots in his stomach to untie.
Wakatoshi approaches her house. He subtly remembers the things she would say and talk about on their way there. The way her eyes closed when she laughed. The way her graceful hands always sat in front of her, with her two index fingers tracing shapes. The way she granted him comfort through one glance or one touch. He wishes he can go back and fix this mess, fixing a mess he doesn't thoroughly understand. If he talks to her, he can leave for the tournament focused and content. He can mend everything, right now.
He's right outside the gates, but notices a figure taking a seat. It may be a guest or parent, so he hides behind a bush. He can't tell. He slowly steps up on a stone and holds on to the part of the fence. He looks at the figure. Stealing a glance, only for a moment. He stares in pure shock.
YOU ARE READING
Lavender | Wakatoshi Ushijima
Fanfiction'Everything seems to wash away with the tide and it's just two naïve kids staring at each other again, making promises to a future that isn't promised. A world they haven't seen, a life they haven't lived. A journey that's uncertain except for these...
