My Little Pony: Issues are Magic

The Fuck Up

Relay woke up bright and ready to start another wonderful day working for King Phantom. He walked up to the throne room to find Phantom overseeing his will.

"Hey boss, why are you overseeing your will?" Relay asked.

Luna was helping her since shes technically a lawyer.

"The dark magic is starting to take over my body so i'm making sure before I die my assets are taken care of, speaking of, how would you like to take over Equestria if i die, along with Callisto of course. As soon as you give me an answer you have the rest of the day off." Phantom said.

"I-I think Callisto can handle it on her own..." Relay said.

"Okay then, you are dismissed." Phantom said.

As Relay exited he stopped holding his breath from the sheer smell of weed coming from the throne room. He heard 3 distinct screams coming from the living room. As he entered he saw the aftermath of Polaris enabling Sacred but this time there was someone there to call him out on his bullshit.

"WHY WOULD YOU GIVE HER COKE?!" Nick screamed.

"She's usually not like this after she does it!" Polaris said.

Screams of wails and pain were coming from Sacred.

"Have you even ever seen a person take that much coke and still be alive, let alone fucking conscious?" Nick asked.

"You act like you know everything about her." Polaris answered.

"Matter a fact, I do. Because, unlike you, I took the time to listen to her." Nick said.

"Guys, what the fuck is going on?" Relay asked.

"reeeelayyy myyy maiiiin mannnnn." Sacred said.

"This fucking asshole gave Sacred fucking cocaine." Nick replied.

"Dude what the fuck, that might of been laced with something and it sure as hell looks like it was." Relay said.

"WHY ARE YOU GUYS BEING SO MEAN TO ME! I WAS JUST TRYING TO HELP!!" Polaris screamed.

"Help?? How? Fucking killing her? I'm taking Sacred to the hospital. If you see Callisto tell her where I am." Relay said.

"She's at the bar with Ellis, I was going to go but I had this to deal with." Nick said.

"Oh great." Relay said.

"Now for you.." Nick said, grabbing a baseball bat.

Relay ran into Sulfur, bawling her eyes out holding adoption papers.

"If you're looking for Callisto, they're at the Horse's Tail, she's probably really fucking drunk and I don't have time for this." He said, speeding off.

"Thank- damn he's gone." Sulfur said.

At the Horse's Tail, it wasn't hard for Sulfur to find the extremely intoxicated Callisto crying while venting to her new redneck apprentice.

"Should I call her mom now? I mean, shes not technically my mother yet but I've called her that for years..." Sulfur asked herself.

"Sulfur!! My child come here! Ellis this is Sulfur!" Callisto said.

She smelled so strongly of alcohol, Sulfur almost threw up.

"How long have you been drinking?" She asked.

"A while, it seems." Ellis said.

"You haven't been with her all day?" Sulfur asked.

"No ma'am, I just got here. I saw the princess and sat next to her." Ellis replied.

"Anyway, Callisto i'm bringing you home so you can sober up and sign my adoption papers." Sulfur demanded.

"Oh my gods. Did your mom die?" Callisto asked as if she sobered up right then and there.

"Yeah, in the hospital last night..." Sulfur replied.

"Give me those papers." She said as she took the papers from sulfur.

"Thanks mom..." Sulfur said.

Callisto lit up.

"It's official!" Callisto said.

"Let's go home, you too Ellis." Callisto followed up with.

As they step foot in Canterlot Castle, Callisto gave Sulfur a big hug.

"Go find an empty room, I think the room next to Relays might be open." She said.

As Callisto entered the living room, they found Nick daydrinking, which was normal for him but he looked angry.

"What's wrong dude?" They asked.

"Fucking Polaris.. He gave Sacred laced coke and now she's in the hospital with Relay, they wont even let me in the fucking room." Nick answered.

"I always knew he'd fuck up like this." She replied.

He took a sip of the Jack Daniel's in his cup.

"Is that my Jack?" They asked.

"Maybe." He answered.

"Didn't even share." She shook her head.

"I'll leave you to it." She said, exiting the living room.

Callisto knocks on the door

"Hey are you settled in? I'm gonna go to sleep, goodnight, I love you." She said, exiting as quickly as they came in.

- to be continued