I Am a Woman

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Ma, what was that?" Salubong na tanong ko kay Mama once we reached one of the empty rooms upstairs. I was referring to what Lolo Sebastian said earlier.

Kakatapos lang ng dinner at wala akong ibang ginawa kung hindi kumain ng tahimik at indahin ang titig ng bisita ni Lolo.

I don't want to be rude. Lalo na at kaharap namin ang lolo at magulang ko kaya naman nginingitian ko na lang ito ng tipid tuwing nagkakasalubong ang mga mata namin. Sakto kasi at sa harap ko pa talaga ito pinaupo ni Lolo. I was even asked by my parents to pull out the chair for her.

My Lolo often asks her about things during the dinner at nalaman ko rin na hindi lang pala ito ang inimbitahan ni Lolo kung hindi pati na rin ang mga magulang nito. Hindi nga lang ito nakasama dahil nasa ibang lugar ang mga ito ngayon, na siya namang ikinahinga ko  ng maluwag dahil kung kasama nito ang mga magulang niya ay parang ang bilis naman yata. What's that? Meet the parents agad? I didn't even say that I agree with their decision.

"I also didn't know about it, anak. I just don't want to further upset your Lolo. He's still angry about the scene earlier with Solana." Paliwanag nito. She even pats my back as if she's calming me. Tiningnan ko lang siya ng hindi makapaniwala. 

I don't believe her, especially since she is the one who was pushing me to meet that Verra Normans last time.

"I didn't know that Papa had already been talking to the Normans about that matter, anak. Believe me. Ang akala ko ay gusto niya lang kayong magkakilala. I just heard him talking about business expansion with the Normans. I didn't expect that he would make plans about marriage that fast, Cee." Pangungumbinsi nito sa akin. Can't they just expand the business without the deal of marriage?

But still, alam naman pala nito na ito ang kahihinatnan ng bagay na iyon, kaya di ko pa rin maiwasang madisappoint. Wala man lang silang ginawa para maiwasan sana ang ganitong sitwasyon. Just like the decision they made about hiding my gender.

They got me stuck in this pretend thing, and now gusto naman yata nila na mas lalong lumala ang sitwasyon at ipakasal ako sa isang babae rin. 

Even though I've been pretending as a man for years, never in my life have I dreamed of marrying a woman.

I'm still holding on to the hope of getting myself out of this situation and be free. That I can finally be a woman who can marry a man.

I release a heavy sigh.

"Please do something about this, Mama. This is getting insane! We are both women!" I said, half-yelling. I didn't mean to talk to my mother in this tone. Sadyang naiinis lang talaga ako sa nangyari.

My mother quickly motioned for me to be quiet because of that.

"Lower your voice, Cee. Baka may makarinig sa atin." May pangamba sa boses nito.

"Your father and I will talk to your Lolo, anak. I will convince your Lolo. Deal with this for the mean time habang hindi pa kami nakakaisip ng ibang paraan ng papa mo, okay?"

"Just make sure you will do something about this, Mama. I don't want this thing to get more serious." Hindi ko kayang magpakasal sa kanya. Lalo na at pareho naman kaming babae.

"I promise, Cee." Pinatakan ako ng halik nito sa noo at niyakap.

Ilang sandali kami nanatili sa ganoong posisyon bago niya ako inutusan na bumaba na.

"Now, mauna ka na muna bumaba dahil baka hinahanap ka na ng Lolo mo. I will just call your father para umakyat dito para makapag-usap kami tungkol dito."