𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐒

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ³³

I blush, but I nod. As silly as it sounds, Kook has the most beautiful voice I've ever heard. And right now, I don't care how childish I seem. His voice is all I want to hear.

He is silent for a moment, deciding on the song, probably. Then, he breaks out into the one of my absolute favorites, the one that will always make me want to either cry or laugh or even be grateful I'm alive.

So long to all my friends
Everyone of them met tragic ends
With every passing day
I'd be lying ifI didn't say
That I miss them all tonight
And if they only know what I would say

If I could be with you tonight
I would sing you to sleep
Never let them take the light behind
your eyes
One day I'll lose this fight
As we fade in the dark
Just remember you will always burn as
bright

Be strong and hold my hand
Time becomes for us you'll understand
We'll say goodbye today
And I'm sorry how it ends this way
If you promise not to cry
Then I'd tell you just what I would say

If I could be with you tonight
I would sing you to sleep
Never let them take the light behind your eyes
One day I'll lose this fight
As we fade in the dark
Just remember you will always burn as bright

Sometimes we must grow stronger and
You can be stronger when I'm gone
When I'm here no longer
You must be stronger and if I-

And then I drift off to sleep, lured by Jungkook's soft voice in my ears. When I wake again, Jungkook has stayed true to his word.

He's fallen asleep right next to me, arms still faithfully wrapped tightly around my body. His stomach is facing my back, so his face is burrowed into the back of my shirt.

He's always been the best cuddler. Only this time, we're not alone. When I look around the room, eyes still a little groggy from sleep, I notice someone standing by the bed near the window.

Once my vision focuses a little, I finally realize that it's Jimin. He must be home from school.

"I hate you so much," he says when he notices I'm awake.

I wiggle away from Jungkook a tiny bit, rubbing my eyes. "Um. Ok? I'm sorry?"

But Jimin doesn't let up. "I come home from school, already worried because both you and Jungkook missed the rest of classes and then I walk into my own home, to have my own father tell me that one of my best friends tried to commit suicide and is sleeping away the pills he took in our own guest room Tae, I fucking hate you."

I blink, shocked and unsure of what to say. Then Jimin's face softens and he scoots closer to me. "I'm sorry, Tae. I don't actually hate you. It's just you're a fucking good friend, and those are hard to come by these days. I don't know what I'd do if we lost you."

I examine the quilt on the bed. "Yeah, I've heard that a couple times already. I'm really sorry Jimin. I wasn't thinking about you guys."

Actualy, you were. You just didn't think they cared.

Oh, shut up, I tell myself. I don't want to think about that right now.

"I don't blame you," Jimin says.

"Really. That's not a fun place to be in. Obviously, if you died I'd find a way into the afterlife just so I could murder you myself, but I do understand."

I stare at Jimin for a bit. Honestly, I have no idea who this guy was standing in front of me.

"Jimin," I say after a moment. "Can we hang out more?"

His face breaks into a smile. "Of course, dude. I'd love to."

I look over to Jungkook. "He's still asleep. Want to draw anything on his face?"

We grin at each other, and even though everything feels awful and I'm guilty and struggling between trying harder and wanting to do it again, Jimin and I are laughing together.

And when Jungkook wakes up and gives me a kiss and we're trying as hard as we can to not laugh at the mustache that is now drawn above his lip, things feel slightly normal.

And then Jungkook goes into the bathroom, and all we hear is, "IM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU GUYS!"

I haven't laughed like that in a while.

No, things aren't okay.

But maybe, just maybe, they might be eventually.

~~~~~~~