𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐒

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ³⁷

Yoongi and I are halfway through Empire Strikes Back, because let's face it, the old movies will always be the best. My mother has just made us a giant plate of nachos that we're thoroughly enjoying, when my phone rings. I groan and lean over to pause the movie before picking up my phone. It's Tae.

"Hey, Tae," I say.

"Hi Chim," Tae's quiet voice comes back through the line.

"What's up?" I ask.

"Um. Well, I just thought you might want to know. So, um, I'm going to tell my family tonight. About everything, I think. Jungkook says I should get some help."

I smile, proud of Tae for facing his fears. "That's good, Tae. I agree with Jungkook. Just remember, it might not go well at first. Make sure to give your parents some time if it's a shock to them."

"Yeah." I can hear him take a deep breath. The poor thing must be so nervous. "I'll try. I'm scared they're going to hate me."

"They won't hate you, I promise."
I know his parents. Yes, complete assholes, but they love their children nevertheless.

"Are you sure about that?"

"Yes. And even if that was possible, you know I would march right over there and strangle them with my bare hands."

At that, Yoongi snorts unattractively. I glare at him and he grins back.

"Okay." Tae takes another deep breath.

"Thank you."

"Anytime man. Now, what about Jungkook?"

"What about him?"

"His dad. Is he going to do anything about that?"

Tae starts stuttering. "Wait.-what? How do you-. Um, how do you know about that?"

I pause. "Umm he told Yoongi and I a few days ago."

"Oh." Pause. "Ok, I guess that's good. He isn't sure yet, but I think he needs to tell his mom and then they can get a divorce and Jungkook can live with her."

"I think that might be best. Maybe I'll talk to him."

"Okay. I gotta go Chim, talk to you later? And thank you again."

"Alright. You're welcome, and good luck."

We hang up, and I turn to Yoongi, who's looking at me with a peculiar expression on his face. "What?" I ask.

"I'm getting the feeling that you're the one who really keeps this group in one piece."

I shrug. "Someone's gotta do it."

"Doesn't it get exhausting?"

"Maybe. I guess. But I don't mind. I like feeling like I have a purpose."

Yoongi slings his arm across the back of the couch, (very attractively might I add) and gives me a pondering look, eyebrows furrowed. "Doesn't your Bible or whatever say that you always have a purpose?"

I lean back into the couch, sighing a bit. "Yes. But you have to understand, Yoongi, that just because I believe in God doesn't mean that I don't struggle. I'm constantly doubting things. I usually feel worthless, you know that. But Jesus is still my savior, that's the whole point of it."

Yoongi scoots closer to me, and my breathing speeds up a bit. "But why do you need a God to tell you that you're worth something? You said it's hard for you to believe that. So why does it matter?"

His face is closer then it was before, and it's making it hard for me to breathe properly. "Because. Without God, I think I'd be a lot worse off then I am. It's hard to understand...but maybe someday you will."

"But...don't other people help? Like, when I tell you're worth something?" My heartbeat is going way too fast. I don't know what it is, but something in his tone and posture has changed.

My eyes widen as he leans closer and closer, and looking into my eyes with intensity. Then, his gaze shifts down to my lips, and that's when I freak out. I push myself backward, away from him.

"Yoongi.. What are you doing?"

"I...I don't know."

~~~~~~~