𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐒

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ³⁹

-Taehyung's POV-

I spend all of the next day in a daze, totally unable to comprehend what happened.

Maybe I should explain. I sat my parents down at the dinner table last night, shaking and sweating and so nervous I thought I would actually throw up.

My family was confused as hell. Well, my parents more so. Taeyong just sat and stared at me with a knowing look in his eyes, like he already knew what I was going to say.

It didn't go too badly, I suppose. I said mostly what I wanted to say. The worst part was that awful silence after I explained as gently as I could that I had tried to kill myself and how Jungkook (who I also mentioned was now my boyfriend,) convinced me to tell them.

They just stared at me in a shocked silence; I think my mom had actually stared crying. We slowly started to figure it out from there.

But it was a miracle. My parents didn't hate me, they didn't yell or tell me I was doing it for attention. They didn't even have a problem with Jungkook as my boyfriend, just said that they'd love me no matter what. Sure, my father was a little stiff and cold, but I think that's because he was honestly too shocked to realize what was happening. We talked over a couple things. My mom suggested we go right to finding a therapist and getting some help, and everyone else agreed. I sat through the whole thing trying to not freak out, because I was hating how the topic on conversation was just about me.
(Stupid, I know, considering I was the
one that brought it up.)

Long story short, I have an appointment in two days to figure out what's wrong with me. Slightly cynical way of looking at it, but can you blame me? I'm still kicking myself for what I did, to Jungkook and my friends.

How could I be so selfish? Granted, I honestly thought I'd be doing the world favour.

Now, I don't know. The question has still been weighing on my mind, the question of what would have happened if I had succeeded.

At this moment, though, I don't want to think about it. I spot Jungkook at his locker, and a grin breaks out on my face. He sees me and runs over to give me a giant hug. He pulls back after a bit to look at my face. "How'd it go?" he asks.

"Like, were your parents acting weird at all this morning?"
I had told him the basics of the night over text, but it was late and texting important things weren't really my thing. "Um." I pause, thinking about it.

"Not really. I mean they're kind of acting like I'm going to try to off myself at any moment."

"I mean, you can't really blame them,"
Jungkook says with a sad look on his face. I look down at the floor. "Yeah, I know," I say softly.

He tries for a smile. "But this is good, right? Your parents are getting you help?"

I nod. "I think so."

He looks at me for a little longer, then pulls me into a tight hug. "You doing okay?" He asks softly.

I bury my face into his shirt.
"Sometimes it seems like you're the only one who asks that and actually cares."

"Hey," Jungkook replies. "Jimin cares, Yoongi cares, Taeyong cares. They all care a lot."

I think back to last night and this morning with Taeyong. He was amazing; didn't ask me any questions I didn't want to answer and didn't act weird.

He only asked if I was okay and if I wanted to talk about anything, and then said that he knew I wasn't in a good place and that he was happy I could finally talk about it.

"I know," I tell Jungkook finally. "It's just hard. Because I know I'm not okay." He presses a kiss to my forehead. "I know, darling."

~~~~~~~