Holy Sin | | JJK

41

<JK>

I knew this wasn't going to end up good. I had allowed So Young to hang out with y/n but it was such a bad decision. I could have done anything to deny her request but I didn't because when have I ever been able to deny anything she really wants? I do that because I feel like I owe her a lot and indeed I do.

Tapping my fingers on the steering wheel, anxiousness ran through my veins. My heart was beating wildly and all sort of rubbish thoughts surrounded my mind. Y/n was with Su Young and if anything slips out from her mouth by mistake it could make blunders.

I don't want So Young to find about us. Not at least like this. I'm not capable of seeing her hurtful eyes.

But y/n worried me more. I know her very well and I know about the relationship she had with Su Young. I can't even imagine how she would feel. How would she even look her in the eye?

God, I'm so stupid. I am doing so so wrong with both the girls.

I glanced at my watch sitting inside my car. I didn't know where to go. Not my house. I just wanted to meet y/n. She should be back by now. I dial her number but she doesn't answer. Slamming my fist on the steering wheel I threw my head back in frustration. I dialed again and again until she finally picked up.

"Hello." My heart stopped hearing her voice. Her voice was so hoarse and almost inaudible. It was as if she had been crying for so long that her throat was sore. Holy Gods.

What have happened?

"Y/n, are you okay? Are you home? I'm coming." And she hanged up the phone without another word. I pressed my foot on the pedal accelerating my car. Taking a U-turn, I drive to her house.

I knock on the door furiously but she doesn't come to get me. I could hear her sobs. "Y/n, please open the door." Even if she hears me she doesn't reply. I wait for another minute before I am reminded that I know her pass code. I punch in the number and I'm thankful that the door is opened the next second.

"What in-"

A low gasp leaves my lips. My eyes opening wide and my jaw dropping to the floor in surprise. I freeze on my spot roaming my gaze over the place. Everything is a mess. As if someone had broke into the house and they have fought in here.
Glass pieces shattered on the floor, everything lying on the ground and then her figure catches my attention.

Another surprised gasp leaves my lips seeing her on the ground surrounded with sharp glasses. I walk to her side carefully bending down to her level.

"Y/n, I'm here. Look at me." I pat her shoulders lifting her chin. My heart clenches seeing her messy face, her uneven breathe and then her bloody hands.

"What in the hell you did here?" I mumble carrying her in my arms. She wraps her arms around my neck pushing her face in my chest. Her sobbing getting louder with every step I take towards her bedroom.

"Why did you leave me?" She stutters in between her sobs.

"No y/n. I didn't leave you. I never would. See, I'm right here." I make her sit on the bed leaning her back on the headboard. "I'll bring the first aid kit real quick, okay?" She doesn't reply. I rush towards the bathroom bringing the first aid kit. I sit beside her hugging her figure.

"You don't even have an idea how much I love you." My trembling hands halt their actions as my brain goes blank. An uneasy feeling rising in my stomach and my heart twisting abruptly.

Until I've heard her say it out loud I didn't even realize that was what I was dying to hear.
I bite my lips forcing myself to not let the tears out. If I break down right now I wouldn't be able to pick myself together.

"Jungkook I love you. Why don't you see that?" I feel her throwing her fists on my chest that feels like a soft touch. I brush her hair back caressing her soft skin.
I hold her wrists pulling away. "Let me bandage these." I mutter under my breathe before cleaning the wound. "Does it hurt?" She sniffles shaking her head. "Not anymore" She isn't sobbing anymore but tears wouldn't just stop. I bandage her wounds keeping the box away. She pulls my wrist sliding them around her waist. I look at her with a raised brow while she keeps her head on my chest.

"I want to know. I want to know it all. Not from So Young. But from you. Jungkook I can't. I love you so damn much and I can't let this go. I know you don't love me anymore but you have loved me at least at some point—" I don't let her continue. Because that's the limit of how much my heart can take. She loves me. And I hear the sincerity in her voice. I choose to trust her. I choose her. I wish I would have done that back then. I wouldn't repeat my mistake. Otherwise I wouldn't be able to live my life. How will I without her?

And oh holy mother of sweet Jesus how do I tell her that I don't love her like I did in the past instead I love her more this time. So much that I'd do anything but not let go of her.

I hold her face in my hands kissing her lips. She instantly kisses back holding my waist. I tilt my head deepening the kiss. This kiss isn't the usual one. This one is full of love, loyalty and sincerity.

This kiss is a promise and I wouldn't break it.

I pull away keeping my forehead on hers, my lips touching hers as she breathes against my mouth, her chest colliding with mine and her heart beats thumping against my skin. I hold her tight in my arms staring straight into her teary eyes.

"If there's someone whom I'm capable to love in every life time, then it's you y/n."

I whisper brushing my lips over hers as a lone tears slips from my eyes landing on her cheeks.

"I be damned to have thought I could hate you. Trust me, I can't. Because it's the last thing in the world I'll imagine."

I pull her closer onto my lap as her eyes flicker. Closing my eyes I whisper against her lips. "I, Jeon Jungkook, can only claim you. And I'm yours to be claimed. In this lifetime and in any other life time where we happen to exist."