Holy Sin | | JJK

43

I stared at the ceiling letting my head hit the pillow. I laid flat on my back, my hands resting on my stomach.

"I don't even remember something like that happening."

His words echoed in my ears like a chant. Our conversation has ended right there three hours ago. He had gotten a call from his father and he immediately had to fly to Japan since his father had to be admitted in the hospital. I know he wanted to stay and clear out the misunderstandings between us but that was the second thing both of us cared about.

What mattered to both of us was Jungkook's father's health.

I had been close to Jungkook's father. I had known him for four years and he had always treated me as his own daughter. I envy Jungkook's relationship with his family. He is blessed with a perfect family. Something I'd never have.

But what is family, really?

Don't we choose our own family? Our own people with whom we can get a little out of line and who'd go out of their ways for us. That's what we call family.

And I had made Jungkook's family mine way before. But both of us had hid our relationship because of our own reasons. They all know me as Jungkook's good friend. Way too good.

I had asked Jungkook to take me with him but he refused. Instead he promised to keep me updated. I was grateful for it.

But now when I laid to get a sleep I couldn't help but think of our conversation.
Nothing was cleared out yet but I just knew that the truth this time was far more better than a dream.

I am curious.

Why doesn't Jungkook remember what had happened that day? He couldn't be lying because he's a bad actor and also his face and eyes tells the tales of his sincerity and honesty. I wish I had seen it before.

But better late than never.

"I don't even remember that happening."

Those words just wouldn't leave my brain. What actually happened that day?

———————-
—————

29th September, 2015

11:45 pm KST

📍The Rise Banquet Hall📍

"Isn't it nice? We have two parties in a row. Your birthday and the after party of the annual event." Ji Ho chimed jumping on the bed behind me. I scoffed turning around. "Why are you changing your dress though?" He asked tilting his head in confusion.

I turned around completely ready in the blue black dress.

"Jungkook gifted this to me in advance. Gonna wear it for the cake cutting later." I answered turning around to look at my reflection in the mirror. The dress was so pretty. And so was Jungkook. I was dying to meet him.

I haven't seen him since an hour or two maybe but that was my fault because suddenly I had to go to my house. Another family drama.

Anyways, fifteen more minutes and then I can bet this birthday is going to be the most memorable one in my life. I just get that feeling.

"Oh!" Ji Ho replied sitting up on the bed. I look at him with suspicion as he drowns into his thoughts. I wave my hands in front of his face. "Back to earth Mister." I spoke walking away to wear the necklace that was also a gift from Jungkook.

"Why do you love him so much?" I raised my head looking at him through the mirror. I chuckled hooking the necklace around my neck.

"What do you mean why? I love him because it's him. Do we need reasons to love someone? And especially if it's Jungkook?" The smile on my face was as wide as always. Just remembering the first days when I met Jungkook and then now. Nothing ever changed. He's the same and I am the same. Just our relationship has changed. Something more sweet, more strong, more lovely.

"Right!" He heaved out a sigh standing up beside me. "Come, shall we go?" He extended his hand smiling at me. I clinged onto his arm as we walked down into the hall. The place was surrounded by our classmates and I could hear them whispering how good of a couple Ji Ho and I was.

But today I'm gonna shut them down. Today I am going to make my relationship public. I'm gonna tell everyone that my boyfriend is Jeon Jungkook.

Enough with the rumors of me being with Ji Ho. We both are just too friendly with each other and this society's head is full of shit. Can't look at a boy and a girl being just friends.

I stand behind the table looking around. "Where's Jungkook?" I asked to no one in particular. Everyone just shrugged talking among themselves until his friends spoke.

"I didn't see him after the party. He was with Su Young."

And then suddenly it hit me. Su Young wasn't there too. How am I going to cut this cake without the two most important people of my life?

"Let's wait a little—"

Ji Ho cuts me off handing me the knife. "Y/n, they'll come. You cut the cake." I chuckled nervously. "We can wait for five minutes. Let's cut the cake together." I glanced at the watch. One minute to 12.

I felt anxiousness running through my veins as a strange feeling erupted inside my stomach.

"Y/n, just cut it." Everyone started whining. I nodded my head with a pout on my face. I wanted to wait for them but there for too much pressure. It's alright. It's just a damn cake.

I sliced the cake as they sang the birthday song for me like kids and then laughing. Ji Ho sang a song for me that he composed himself. It was beautiful. And why not? It was Ji Ho who wrote the song.

Everyone got too immersed in the party that I was left alone in the corner. I walked up to the rooms to search for Jungkook. I dialed his number but he wasn't picking up his phone.

"Jungkook, where are you?" I whined to myself looking at the watch. It was fifteen minutes to one and there was no sight of Jungkook.

I suddenly halted in front of a particular room from where I could hear the ringing of his phone. I walked towards the door and the sound of the ringtone got louder. I heaved out a sigh of relief.

He was right here.

My lips curled up as I placed my hand on the door knob turning it.

"Jungkook, why—" I trailed off. The colours from my cheeks drained away and my smile dropped. Tears rushed in my eyes as I couldn't take my eyes off the sight in front of me.

Jungkook and Su Young.

My trembling hands held onto the door as a support to not fall on the ground. It felt like my world came crashing right on my feet.

I shut the door behind my back as tears fell from my eyes soaking my cheeks. I wiped them rushing out of the hall and sitting inside my car. I had lost both my lover and my friend.

That night I drove off to the mountain near my house. And from there all I could here was my screams. So much anger, frustration, heart break and disappointment was filled inside my heart.

And I had repeatedly shouted one thing.

"Jungkook, I hate you."