A College Seeress' Diary

Tour of Details

Dear Jesus,

"Radiance," Dad called tentatively. Probably to confirm if my spirit was still with them.
My head had been bent for some minutes, my mind swirling faster than the speed of light.

Everything they'd told me added up. That's why my Dad's relations were not too close. That's why I never had siblings. That's why...

I looked up with glassy eyes.
A defiant tear slid out. I tasted salt.
The cup had run over and waterfalls fell. Bad dam.

"Oh, my aura," Mom said and rose to sit by me. We were cramped on the small sofa, but I allowed her to hug me tight.
I sobbed into her chest, clinging to her like my life depended on it.

I could also feel Mom's few blobs of hot tears drop into my hair.

When my crying had reduced to sobs and sniffing, Dad spoke again.

"We're sorry to have allowed you to go through this. Hearing this. But we believe the Lord has great plans. We're just obeying him."

"Many times, your mother and I had arguments and quarrels that threatened to split us, but we'd just remember you and we'd reconcile. We know that you're a rare treasure given to the world. We do try our best to be noble caretakers. We have and will never see you as anything less than our own real, biological child."

"Mom, Dad, I- I am so- so sorry," I croaked.

I was sure I was a puffy-eyed blubbering mess. Add that to my nerdy glasses and my cast, and I was the perfect picture of a wounded lamb.

"It's okay, Star," Mom whispered as she rubbed my shoulder.

"You've never for once made me suspect that I wasn't your real child. In fact, when you told me, I found it so so hard to accept. I thought it was one silly prank. I got so angry when I realized you weren't joking, but Jesus helped me to see beyond my selfishness and forgive."

I cleared my throat. And summoned my courage to ask, "You mentioned my grandparents...?"

Dad nodded.

"Um, I- I'm going to need time to digest what I have heard. I want to think and pray about it. I still have so many questions."

Mom said, "We understand."

I inhaled and pulled up a shaky smile. My face felt caked from the dried trail of tears.

"Mom, Dad, have I ever told you guys how much I love you? I mean it so much more now. Thank you... For everything."

Dad looked like he was about to cry now but was pulling up all his macho strength not to.

He rose slowly and so did Mom.

In a voice laden with emotion he said, "We love you too, Radiance."

Mom added, "With our every breath."

Together they pulled me into a warm embrace and began muttering prayers to me.

I leaned on them, happy I wasn't rejected but loved.
The scent of Dad's sandalwood cologne and Mom's flowers washed away all doubts of their love for me.
This was home.

"Um, so, what now?" I asked, lifting my head to gaze into their faces. We had stood there in comfortable silence, breathing, hearts beating in sync.

Dad grinned and then winked at me. "I guess we have some things to show you that we're certain you'd be interested in."

I blinked. "Really?"

We disentangled, but still, they held me at arm's length so I would be balanced since I wasn't holding my walking stick.