Seven Deadly Sins X Reader, Wolf Sin Of Despond

What I am

(Y/N): "Soo . . . How cool am I?" It was too boring to walk the whole way in silence, so I figure I might as well start a conversation of some kind.

Merlin: "You're very intriguing, to say the least. If that's what you were referring to by 'cool' anyway."

I nod my head.

(Y/N): "Cool . . ."

After walking a few more steps, I roll my head and look at her. I open my mouth to mention Escanor in some way, but close it. How can I start this without it being too obvious?

I mean I've been telling Escanor since I met him that I'd try to wingman, but . . . What do I do? I mean I have a girlfriend so it shouldn't be . . That . . Oh my god I have a girlfriend! Why is that just now setting in? I don't know but I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!!

(Y/N): "So . . ."

I take a few more steps in silence as she floats ahead.

(Y/N): "Are we there yet?"

Okay so maybe I panicked and blurted that out . . . Okay, it's fine, I just need to plan first.

Merlin: "If I had known you'd be so impatient, I would have just teleported us there immediately."

(Y/N): "Wait actually yeah, why didn't you just do that?"

Merlin: "I figured you'd want to mentally prepare yourself. I mean, is this not your reason for joining the Sins?"

(Y/N): "Uh, yeah I guess that's good reasoning. . . Do I need to prepare? I mean how significant is it? How much did you find out? Do you know what I am? My species? Ahh I don't care just zip us there I need to know as soon as possible!"

She sighs.

Merlin: "Well, I suppose there's no time like the present then."

She snaps her fingers and bam! We're inside her lab.

Merlin: "Before your mind becomes fully occupied with what I'm about to tell you, I must say, you certainly are quite the interesting specimen. I hope to be studying more of you in the future."

I clap my hands infront of my face and rest my nose on my thumbs, taking a deep breath. This is it. This was my goal from the start and here it is. The answer to everything I've ever wanted to know.

(Y/N): "Alright, I'm going to have a lot of questions, so be prepared for that."

Merlin: "I would expect nothing less."

(Y/N): "Okay go. What am I?"

Merlin: "One of a kind. There likely will never be another of you, and that's due to what makes you up."

(Y/N): "What? So- so I really am the only me?"

Merlin: "Unfortunately, yes."

Even though I had expected this for the longest time, it really stings. I am the only one after all.
My eyes wetten slightly, and I blink it back in.

(Y/N): "Well what am I made of then?"

Merlin: "To put it simply, a mixture of two opposing energies. Half Demon Energy, half Goddess Energy. How this is possible I haven't quite put together yet, nor why this would ever happen."

(Y/N): "I- I'm made of . . . I- wh- okay . . . And uh, did you figure out why my abilities are going? Or why I'm able to split into an evil twin?"

Merlin: "Yes. Notice how your energy has changed to primarily white? That's the Goddess energy. The two energies have always been fighting for dominance, and previously there was enough Goddess energy to resist and remain, while the Demon took the lead. Most of your previous abilities were Demonic abilities, and with your Goddess energy now growing to severely outnumber the Demon, it's getting pushed out. Every day that goes by you have less Demon energy and more Goddess. However it's not all bad, as you're gaining new abilities in place of your old ones. The ability to manifest weapons out of your energy, the ability to create an Ark, and presumably more to come."

(Y/N): "Oh . . Oh okay . . Is there a way for me to keep it? Or to equalize the energy?"

Merlin: "Not currently, no."

I nod my head.

(Y/N): "And about the twin thing?"

Merlin: "That one was difficult to figure out, but I believe it's because you have two different types of energy."

(Y/N): "Right, Goddess and Demon."

My eyes widen.

(Y/N): "Is that why I'm changing? Am I a Goddess while he's a Demon?!"

Merlin: "Interesting theory, but not what I was referring to. I mean you have Primary Energy and Excess Energy. Primary Energy is what makes up your body, and Excess Energy is things like your tendrils, or your weapons. The only other Power Level I've seen that's able to fluctuate so much, without separate forms anyway, is Escanor's. However, while his is tied to the time of day, yours is tied to your Excess Energy."

(Y/N): "Oh, so that's why I couldn't transform unless my power level was high enough, I needed enough energy!"

Merlin: "Precisely. Once you loose enough tendrils, or shoot enough energy beams, you'll run out of Excess Energy and will be unable to preform your abilities. However your power level should be at about a 40,000 minimum now. Very impressive."

(Y/N): "Thank you!"

Merlin: "Now on the other hand, Primary Energy is what you yourself are. Not only does this energy produce Excess Energy, but it's what keeps you together, gives you your unique life. If you loose enough of this energy, you'll die permanently. I would think half would be enough, but you've clearly proven otherwise. So I'd say about two thirds."

(Y/N): "Oh great, so I do have a way to die."

Merlin: "This would be due to the Primary Energy not having enough left in it to produce more, like it did for your bottom half. And I suppose the other way around."

(Y/N): "So, other me and myself healed back what we lost? Were we split equally or if I chop off my arm will there be another me?"

Merlin: "If you recall, while we were fighting the Vampires you did loose a limb. That never grew a body.

(Y/N): "Ohhh yeah, I had almost forgot that! Say, you wouldn't happen to know about my memory loss as well?"

Merlin: " I do. And as for the equal half, firstly you were the majority, and secondly the missing Primary Energy should just wither like your arm did. Now for the memory loss, that would most likely be due to the energy conflict. Demon and Goddess energies are opposites, so I find it most reasonable that the combination was poisoning you in a way. Only able to remember the most notable events in your life for a few decades at most. However, since your body is primarily Goddess now, that shouldn't occur anymore."

(Y/N): "Hold on, you're really telling me that I was poisoning myself? Would I have died if nothing changed?"

Merlin: "Probably in the next hundred years, yes."

(Y/N): "Oh . . . Uh . . . Is that all?"

Merlin: "For now. I still have yet to figure out who made you and how your twin is even possible."

(Y/N): "Okay . . I'm uh, I'm gonna go process all of this."

I walk towards the door, slowly reaching for the handle.

Merlin: "I will do my best to continue helping you, (Y/N)."

(Y/N): "Thanks, Merlin."

I push open the door and walk out.