Mr. Lee

35

The next few days are quiet.

Jaeje wakes up the day after everything with Heeseung and feels like complete crap.

She tells Hyejin she's using one of her sick days and it doesn't take much for Hyejin to believe, seeing as her runny nose and sunken eyes help the excuse.

Jaeje thought she had finalized this a thousand times before, and yet again she had to look through a pile of clothes she never even wore for something to go put on.

Sometimes she wondered if her mirror had a sense of humor, she would look amazing in something she tried on, but the minute she looked again she just looked plain.

Jaeje looked at what felt like the hundredth outfit, it looked good on her.

She avoided any mirrors for the rest of the day.

Heeseung doesn't call her.

She falls back asleep half an hour later.

She wakes up again sometime after 11 and goes to take a shower, not bothering to look for an outfit and just puts on another pair of pajamas, going back to lay down.

She's undeniably hungry and only lasts a few minutes before heading to the kitchen to grab something that doesn't require any cooking before heading back inside her room.

Jaeje was angry, no upset, no she was both.

But that's what she told herself to cover what she really felt. Embarrassment. Shame.

She was once again hiding in her room after hearing her mothers comments. Her mother wasn't a bad person, not in the least, but she always seemed to think her words were more of advises than insults.

She had been scrolling through Pinterest and found this amazing outfit design she had liked, she quickly ran to her mums room and showed it to her, wanting something like it made.

Her mum had complimented the dress as usual, but then said it wasn't suited for someone like her, it just wouldn't look good.

"Lose some weight first, I'm sure it'll look nice on you then, only people with a slimmer body wear these kind of stuff" her mother had said. And Jaeje being herself ducked her head and went back to her room.

She had removed the outfit from her memory by the end of the day.

Heeseung hadn't texted.

After stuffing down the food-but-not-exactly-food, Jaeje went back to bed.

Jaeje found herself awake later in the afternoon, nearly 4.

That's right, Hyejin is working late today, probably to just spend more time with Jay. She thought and got up to order herself something to eat.

After scrolling through places she didn't even know about she decided to just get herself Bibimbap.

She waited in the living room while watching whatever was on TV and soon heard the doorbell ring.

She quickly paid and opened up the take away, getting a drink from the fridge before going back to the living room, digging into her food.

She had decided to change her clothes, seeing as the delivery man was almost here. She was currently in her pj's while it was still bright out and the clothes showed off her big frame.

The delivery man wasn't even around for a full minute, Jaeje had already changed back into her pj's and started eating her food.

He probably wasn't judging her size like she feared he would, but to her people were always judging.

Everywhere, everytime, every day.

Jaeje found herself eating faster.

Her phone had never once buzzed.

✤

Heeseung told the agent to look for a new place the next morning.

He had woken up and flatly told Heejin to go away when she came to yell at him to come for breakfast.

Heeseung laid on his bed the evening after his mum's funeral, the night was eerily calm and quiet.

"Hyung? " his friend, one he had made at school, Jay, called out as he walked into the room.

All the adults were still down stairs, sharing condolences and having dinner. The funeral wasn't big, after all no one knew his mother.

He had made friends with Jay at his new school, the boy was all strict and no nonsense, but he still knew how to act like the 8 year old he was from time to time.

"My mother said we're about to leave so I should come say bye, sorry you're mum left you, I can share mine if you want" the boy had whispered upon climbing Heeseung's bed.

Heeseung was quiet.

"Well I get you don't wanna talk right now, but I managed to get some more dessert and figured you'd like some, you like sweets after all, even if they do rot your teeth" the boy continued, placing the treats on the dresser next to Heeseung's bed.

"Bye bye Hyung" Jay whispered, tearing up at the fact his bubbly friend refused to talk to him and gave him one last hug before scurrying off, the sound from his little legs growing distant until they could no longer be heard.

Heeseung looked towards the door as it closed, staring at it for a while before taking one of the candy bars delivered by his friend, removing the wrapper as he sat up and laid back on the head board.

He opened up his mum's suicide note as he took a bite of the chocolate covered sweet.

"Dear the love of my life........"

Heeseung found himself at a high class bar later that night, taking shot after shot as the sun went down and the moon became more visible.

"Excuse me" he called for the bartender and the main needed no further explanation, going to fetch another shot for the high paying customer.

"Well hello, I don't think I've seen you here before" a soft voice spoke as Heeseung turned his head to see a woman wearing a black tight fit dress, showing off her assets which were complimented with her beautiful face.

If it was some time ago Heeseung would have immediately acknowledged her, throwing in some tooth rotting words before taking them both to a hotel for the night.

Heeseung felt nothing.

Hadn't felt anything since Jaeje had pushed him away yesterday and taken a cab back home, not even bothering to get her things from the office.

Yesterday was meant to have been wonderful. But it ended taken a 360 turn for the worse and now Heeseung's own body felt vacant, uninhibited, bare, like he had left himself at that bench. Like they both did.

"Not interested" he gulped down the shot, dropped a few notes on the counter and walked out.