On and Off the Track

N I N E T E E N.

21th May...
I arrived home from Hawaii, yesterday. I was so jet lagged and exhausted from everything that I went straight to sleep as soon as I got back. I woke up early and started to pack up my things that I had at Milas. I was going to furniture shopping later, with Mila. I was excited to live in my own but also nervous.

I sat cross legged on the floor of my bedroom, slowly packing up my toothbrush and a couple of chargers. Tears began to slowly trickle down my cheeks, I sniffed and I wiped them away with my jumpers sleeve. I heard the door open and Mila come sit down next to me. She hugged her knees as she looked across at me. Both of us unable to speak. I tried to smile, my eyes slightly crinkling at the sides. She laughed through her tears, holding her arms out. I fell into her body. My head resting on her chest and we sat there in silence. Both trying not to cry. "I'm only ten minutes down the road" a faintly laugh was exchanged between the two of us. "Still too far away" I smiled, leaning into her even more. I took a big sign and stood up. My phoned pinging, my apartment was ready. I picked up my suitcase and made my way to my car. Mila followed behind me, in her own car. We pulled up and began unpacking.

——————
Later on...

I was currently sitting on the floor of my living room, with only a tv infront of me as I ate a take away. All my apartment had in it was boxes of my clothes, a bed and a Tv. I had no working kitchen appliances or a wardrobe. Luckily some of furniture we brought today was arriving tomorrow. Meaning at least by tomorrow I would have a fridge and a couch.

I went to sleep fairly early again, I was woken up by a phone call, informing me that the delivery men would be ten minutes away. I threw on a pair of joggers and a jumper as I went to open the door for them. I watched them fit my fridge and drop of the parts of my couch off. I stood, my brow furrowed after they left, trying to figure out how to make my couch. There were a lot of pieces and I had no clue how they all fitted together. After a very frustrating and sweaty two hours of me trying to figure out how to build it, I finally figured it out. I slumped down in relief. Taking a moment to look around my place. I could help but smile. I sprang up and clapped my hands. New fridge meant food shop. I loved going food shopping. I switched out my joggers for a pair of leggings and a pair of chunky trainers to look a little more presentable. I grabbed a pair of sunglasses and my bag and made my way down to the garage. I saw that car again, that car I remember so clearly but had no idea from where. It bugged me the whole way to the store.

After getting the food, I took a short walk to a nearby cafe. I grabbed a coffee and a pastry as I sat and watched the morning sea. The sun was hot today and there harbours were beginning to fill up with yachts as people made their way from all over the world to watch the F1 race next week. I could tell the streets were already getting busier with tourists.

My hands burned with pain due to the heaviness of the grocery bags in my hands as I got back home. I dropped them onto the island, and began unpacking. My heart jumped as I heard a low voice come from the living room, "Bronte" my head whipped round, as I gasped. I let out a sigh of relief as I realised it was only my dad. "You scared the living hell out of me". He looked like his normal self. His suit crisp as not one hair lay out of place on his head. His face serious as it always was. I rolled my eyes as I turned my back to him, returning to unpacking the bags. "I've come here to persuade you to go to the Grand Prix next weekend." I scoffed, my focus remaining on my task, "Persuade, you mean force"
"No Bronte, I mean persuade. Our family is one of the biggest investors this year. We need to attend to show our support. I will not allow you to make our family look bad"
"Me and lando just broke up. I don't want to go"
"You wont see him. You are being a child Bronte. This is what it means to be an adult, sometimes you have to do those things which you don't like" his stare fixed on me, his words sliced through the air, leaving no room to argue. "This is bullshit"
"No this is life"
"You can't force me to go"
"I can and I will. I tried to do this the nice way but you are being irrational. I'm putting my foot down, you are going. I dont care what you have to say about it. My word is final. I will refuse to let you drag this family name through the mud once again." I remained quiet, physically biting my tongue.
"Good so I take that as a yes, I'll see you Thursday" I tried to argue back, but it was too late he already left. I stomped my foot and let out a scream. Suddenly, I was seven again, being forced to do something I didn't want. With no respect to what I wanted to do or care for my feelings. I finished unpacking, and went into the living room. I sat down with my sandwich as I turned on the Tv, I flicked through the channels trying to find something to watch. Suddenly an orange car popped up on my screen, whizzing round the Spanish Grand Prix corner. My hand stopped clicking involuntarily. That familiar buzz when watching Lando qualify came back. I tried to not watch it but I couldn't. My eyes glued to the screen as I watched the start of Q3. Charles and Lando both started their last lap, one after each other. Purple sectors flicking between them. I watched Charles fly through the finish line, his name moving up to pole, lando not to far behind. There was a moment of silence, until, I saw his name move just below Charles. He was one hundredth of a second slower. That was all.