THE PLAYERS SERIES : S.M. {book 2}

XXX

"Alexia"

This lone word seems to have the effect of an earthquake, as Alexia turns around, her hazel eyes now planted on mine.

I was puzzled about my feelings at the moment: they undeniably were there, but I felt like I didn't know where that conversation was heading, and to be honest, it was the scariest part. On her side, however, it was pretty clear: her emotionless face just gave me hints of the fact that she wasn't at all happy to see me. Unless...

Frowning, she only answers:

"Mewis?"

Setting my jaw, I just remain silent for a while.

As we were standing here, in the middle of a rooftop with an incredible view on the beautiful city of Sacramento, I just feel my heartbeat increase all of a sudden. Although I knew our initial situations haven't changed, I felt like it was kind of a now or never moment.

Not comfortable with the silence that has settled between us - a silence that was testimony of the unbearable tension between us - Alexia ends up asking:

"How have you, uh, been?"

"Good, good, erm... You?"

"I've been alright" the brunette says, before swallowing her saliva with apparent difficulty and adding: "I've seen you guys' results... congrats, you did the job-"

"Look at us, just making small talk because we can't even stand in front of each other" I suddenly let out, having enough of this.

Alexia raises her eyebrows.

"What?"

"I've been thinking of you every day those past four weeks" I say, not breaking the eye contact. "In every single instant, your face would come up in my mind. I was telling myself I should stop, only nothing worked: I could only think of you, damn it. And here we are now, just making small talk and avoid the actual subject of conversation that matters. Or am I delusional and it is one-sided?"

Visibly confused and on her guards, the Spanish just asks:

"What is?"

Rolling my eyes, I just shake my head no.

"No, no, we're not doing that" I let out, more and more irritated, "we've been through the denial phase, and to be honest, I'm not having it. Like you said before I left: I kissed you. And although I wish it didn't mean anything 'cause it would've been easier, it did mean something. To me, at least - I don't know what it meant to you since you put a whole lot of efforts in hiding what you think and feel. Like, you basically have a conversation disability - you suck at communicating, and trust me it is not your most attractive trait. So here I am, trying to make this big speech about how much I thought of you, while you might or might not return the feeling."

A tensed silence settles in between us, as I can see Alexia is visibly troubled: her hazel eyes were planted in mine, yet they seemed to be avoiding them, in the sense that she was blocking her emotions by also letting them through. It was as if she couldn't hide them anymore - and she did not look happy.

Shaking her head, she finally ends up saying in a strong voice:

"You're right, we're way past that phase of denial. I don't know why I came here, honestly, like, in Sacramento. I've been telling myself it would be good to support our girls of the national team, but this whole time I've just been looking for someone in particular. There, I'll admit it: I really wanted to see you, but when I did, I understood that you had your sights on somebody else."

"What? Who?"

"Oh, please" Alexia lets out, rolling her eyes, "I can't compete with your 10-year best friend and crush, Mewis. Who the hell am I? You were hugging each other, and suddenly it all became crystal clear inside my head: I could never give you what she was willing to give you."

Shaking my head this time, I just take a step closer to Alexia, who steps back.

"Not because we were having a heart-to-heart about our missed chances means something happened, Alexia."

"Yeah, right - that girl is high over heels with you, and you're the only one blindly thinking otherwise."

"Abby is married-"

"So were you, Mewis. This doesn't mean anything. And you know what? Maybe it's for the best: I could never give you all that you deserve. I'm rotten, Mewis, to my core. Un diablo con ojos almendrados, 'a devil with almond eyes', as my father would say. I have to live up to everybody's expectations, and I can't do that while exploring my personal life, my intimacy."

I nod my head, trying to calm myself down.

"I could never fully understand that since I'm not living it" I start, careful, "but you and I both know people don't choose who they fall for."

Scoffing, Alexia just says:

"Mewis..."

Taking another step closer, while Alexia's back touches the small wall behind her, separating her from the void, I just whisper:

"Tell me you don't feel the same and I will leave you alone."

While I feel my heart literally jump off my chest, I just take a final step, leaving only a few inches between our bodies. I can see the panic in Alexia's eyes, while her thick protective walls seem to finally fall down. She couldn't hide the fact that she was absolutely and fully terrified.

Setting her jaw, she just says in a low voice:

"... you know I can't do that."

With that said, she suddenly steps toward me, grabs my jaw, gets on her fingertips and crashes her lips against mine.

I couldn't describe the feeling taking over my whole body at the moment, as I naturally wrap my arms around her hips, bending over as her tongue was asking for permission, which was then granted to her in a heartbeat. Her smell and her taste made my brain explode, while I couldn't think of anything else but her body glued to mine, and her lips touching mine.

After a few seconds, she pulls away, yet leaving her hands on my jaw.

"I'll see you in Barcelona, then" I whisper, before letting go of her, turning around and not turning back on my way inside the building.

Alexia, on the other hand, just remains standing for 30 more minutes, taking it all in, before going back to her room.

The storm had passed - yet dark clouds were still in sight...

______________________________

{literally the only picture existing of them (lol)}