Luna Rising

FIFTY EIGHT

I'm stuck.

More than stuck. I'm trapped.

I couldn't leave the tub because 200 pounds of muscle kept me from going and I felt weakened by his presence.

My heart is racing against my chest, and it hurts. But not painful. It's more intense that Dominic and I are naked in the tub full of water, and you know where this goes.

Dominic reached, and I instantly closed my eyes, just waiting for the anticipation happened, but suddenly my body was turned. My back is facing him.

He made me confused about his actions.

I expected him to make the first move and initiate the lovemaking, but Dominic just started scrubbing my back with a wet cloth.

I wanted to turn my head, but the embarrassment of having us both get too passionate and take it to bed.

What was I thinking?

We aren't ready yet. Although I drugged him, we haven't done the ritual and are no longer virgins.

Just the thought of that night, dragging a drugged Alpha into the forest away from the pack house and having my way with him, I suddenly felt sick to my stomach.

"Lippy, you okay?" Dominic's voice called to me and asked. "Is the water cold?"

I hugged myself tighter and pictured that awful thing that night.

"Nick...I..." I squeezed my eyes shut and had flashes of me forcing on Dominic, drugged and unstable.

I abruptly stand from the tub letting the water slip down my bare skin.

"Lippy?"

I got out, grabbed a robe, and stomped out frantically.

"Lippy, wait," Dominic followed to our bedroom as I started freaking out. "Baby, what's wrong? Talk to me."

I pace in the room, biting my nails.

"Lippy? Please. What is wrong? Did I scrub too hard?" He let out a chuckle.

I know what he meant, but that is not the case.

I inhaled and breathed out shakily. "No..." I brushed my wet hair back. "No, it's not because of that."

I'm afraid to face him and just let him see my back.

"Then what's wrong?"

"Nick," I turned around to him. I am frustrated and angry at myself. "I'm sorry. I need to be alone."

I walked off, but he caught my hand. "Where are you going?"

"Some place where I can hate myself."

"In a bathrobe?" He states at my attired. "Everyone is going to question it, and why are you trying to hate yourself? Don't do that."

"Because-"

"Because what?" Dominic raised his voice but not to frighten me. He pulls me close to him. "Lippy, talk to me. What is going on?"

I went inside my memories and saw flashes of the forest, standing in front of Dominic, who was out cold from the aphrodisiac. I watched myself remove his clothes and mine. Then I watched in horror as the reflection as she twisted her head 180 looking like a lustful monster.

I snapped away from those terrible memories and sobbed.

I couldn't hold back the tears and looked up at him. "I..." I was becoming lethargic when trying to explain until the words came out. "A long time ago, I don't know if you called it a long time, but...I did something disgusting and horrible that I couldn't forgive myself."