Beautiful Dichotomy

chapter 2

Trigger Warning: A triggering slur is used in this chapter. It is not meant to be glorified or made to be taken lightly as it is indeed a racial slur and needs to be treated as such (punishable by law as a hate crime).

As the years went on, Samuel's clothing and accessories somehow got darker. He saw them as a representation of his angst. Needing to always wear his eyeliner and straighten his hair. Sometimes depriving himself of sleep to get deep eye bags.

As this happened, the jokes got worse and the target got bigger.

None of this being helped by the fact that Samuel never tried to make any friends. He kept entirely to himself and just secretly admired Rae. Never even making a move on her, being too scared to.

All the while, Rae's seemingly perfect personality made her known by everyone in the school. She had friends everywhere and a lot of them Samuel questioned how she even stomached a conversation with them. They were the worst... but then again, he knew Rae as much as he could: she'd be friends with anybody.

He grew a lot more comfortable with her, still keeping her at a distance because of his flighty history with moving abruptly. This was one friendship he knew he'd entirely miss too much.

Which is why he tried not to get close to anyone. Regardless if he thinks their brown skin has no imperfections and looks so soft or if their smile makes him feel alive. Refocusing on his book, he continued to read alone in the library. Wearing the same headphones although, nothing was playing through them.

"What the fuck is he wearing?" The small group of guys laughed at Samuel, not caring if he could or couldn't hear them, "fucking chink weirdo" the two friends' laughter immediately dying off at his comment.

"Oh my god, who the hell says that anymore?! What is wrong with you?" Rae asked appalled as she stopped what she was doing to intervene while Samuel kept his head down knowing this wasn't the first time the racial slur was directed at him let alone by Josh, "seriously, do you think that's okay josh?"

"Who even asked your fat ass?" he retorted, his friends no longer laughing, even the librarian only poking her head up. Now Samuel looked between the two of them, fighting the urge to finally speak up but before he did, she continued.

"Are you done now? Got it out of your system?" Her hands shaking, "you need to fucking apologize and I'm not kidding. I'll report you to whoever I need to for saying that. It's actually disgusting."

Josh tried walking off while dismissively waving her off and she followed him.

"Back off Rae you're making a scene for no reason... it was a joke."

"A joke my ass! It's super racist asshole and your friends aren't even laughing," the librarian looking back down at her computer screen Samuel noticed, "hey, Toddy aren't you filipino?"

Toddy said nothing and awkwardly rubbed his neck.

"By the way dumbass, Josh isn't your friend if he says shit like that. Just walks around here saying slurs and no one says anything? My stomach actually hurts from hearing that." Her voice naturally raising as her body started to tremble.

"Settle down and be quiet." The librarian finally speaks up but never looks their direction and not acknowledging the seriousness of the situation.

"Apologize to him now," Rae demanded once again.

"Bro no," Josh started laughed and left the library making her start to go after him until Gabby grabbed her arm to stop her.

"He's never gonna apologize Rae, you've known him since pre-k. He always says stupid shit for laughs."