Beautiful Dichotomy

chapter 52

"I swear it's like we can't keep our hands off of each other," Rae sighed as she clung onto her cup of tea. Dahlia trying not to laugh in front of her as she stared at her roommate who was hunched over, barely looking over the top of her work computer. Eye bags deep and her hair up in a frizzy, half up-half down style. The face framing curls poking out randomly as Rae took another sip, "I need more caffeine or something."

"You should know by now that I will never feel bad for someone who is basically bragging about non-stop, life altering, mind-blowing sex for two weeks." Her voice lowered as they sat together working in a small cafe. Rae's eyes going wide as she tried to hide herself instinctively before hushing her.

Dahlia's laugh loud and dramatic on purpose before she refocused on finishing up her assignment. "For your information, we've taken breaks and stuff. It hasn't been non-stop."

Her face directed at Rae making her put her hands up, "ugh ok... so it might as well be," she then laid her forehead on the table immediately stopping her lie, "what if this is all just a honeymoon phase or something?"

Dahlia rolled her eyes and continued typing, deciding not to warrant the sudden existential crisis with a response.

"I'm serious, none of this makes sense to me."

Rae turned her head, her body still feeling too heavy as she watched Dahlia completely involved in her computer and not her. Groaning, she barely lifted her head high enough to get a small sip of the tea. The same tea that was currently making her want to crawl into a ball and sleep forever.

"Why have you asked me, like 50 times since ya'll reconnected, if something seems off? It's been months girl."

Dahlia's now serious tone catching Rae's attention as she forced herself to sit up straight. "It's just..." she paused to look around the basically empty place, making sure no one was within earshot, "back then like- in high school, I kinda could see us liking one another and even possibly being a thing or whatever."

"Like gothy emo boy and bubbly social butterfly?"

"Not just that."

Dahlia now looked confused as ever, waiting for Rae to continue as her phone rang and she saw his picture on her screen. Silencing her phone, she closed her eyes tightly, "I mean like he went from an outcast to a socially and conventionally attractive person."

"Socially and conventionally attractive." Dahlia wasn't asking for clarification, she was just trying to figure out why the hell Rae even said that.

"So we're just gonna pretend he isn't literally perfect?!" Rae asked still whisper-yelling.

Dahlia dramatically leaned across the table, "no, but I've seen you too."

"Exactly my point, he's too freakin attractive for me," Rae swore Dahlia was agreeing as she let out a sigh of relief, convincing herself that somebody finally understood. "I can't talk about this with him or else he's going to lecture me or-or try to make me feel better. I don't need any of that, I'm just very aware of-"

"Aware of what?" Dahlia had an expression Rae never had seen before. It was so unreadable and stoic, she was afraid to say anything else in that moment. "Aware of the fact that this is all probably coming from you feeling insecure? And everyone is beautiful to someone, so that conventional attractiveness shit is for the birds. I really do hope you don't say any of this crap to Sam, cause it's literal bullshit. Just so you know."

Now Rae was the one who didn't have a response. She finally stopped talking and stared down at her cup, trying not to be angry with Dahlia's harsh words.

"I hate the trends and shit where everyone gets surgery to look the same or buys the same clothes. It's exhausting and unoriginal," Dahlia added, "it's the death of beauty and uniqueness to me... so when anybody, not just you, complains about being ugly in society's eyes, I get a little peeved."

"A little?"

"No I know," she shrugged, "and I'm sorry if I came off strong but since I've met you, I took note that you genuinely prefer being told exactly how it is. Work related or not," she reached across the table to gently touch her hand, "you are gorgeous. Sam is also gorgeous. To me and to everyone around ya'll: you are two pretty people who are happy. And being happy with one another makes you both that much more attractive. Not that it should matter how you guys look to anybody else."

Before Rae could thank her, Dahlia kept going.

"Please just promise me, you'll stop putting yourself down like this. This kinda stuff will eventually cause a major problem between you two. Insecurity might as well be one of the eminent deaths of relationships," she nodded thoughtfully, "to also be honest with you, a lot of people in your tired, sex-dazed shoes would call what y'all have going on fate."

Rae felt like she was put in her place, scolded and loved.

She was appreciative of Dahlia's plainness in her words. Making sure Rae could and would understand exactly what she meant. "Thank you," was all she managed as Dahlia gave her one last smile and now sipped from her own coffee, continuing her work.

Almost an hour went by of a comfortable silence as they worked on their respective computers.

"Want another tea?"

Rae nodded, rubbing her eyes as she messaged to take a break in her chat. As she sat alone at the table, she finally turned her phone over to see 3 missed calls, and 4 missed texts from Samuel. Shaking her head slowly, she saw one of the messages was hidden and needed to be swiped to be seen.

The above three texts reading:

I hope your day is going good. I miss you.

Send me a picture, so I can see you. If you feel like it
ofc.

Are you free tonight?

Samuel absolutely knows that Rae hates taking pictures and sending them. Samuel also knows that Rae confessed to liking when he sends pictures and even the ones that are nsfw.

Imagine Rae's surprise as she went to swipe across the message to reveal a picture of Samuel's bare torso pointing straight down at him pulling his pants down. The curvature of his back to make himself more appealing, the veins on the back of his hand that gripped the waistband of his jeans. Purposefully positioned to pull them lower for the picture.

Flustered, Rae locked her phone and slammed it face down on the table.

Taking a minute to process the photo, glad to know it went back to a blur she cleared her throat and was ready to type something in response. She noticed her thumbs paused over the keyboard, not sure if she should bring up her still lingering concerns about the ease of their relationship or the fact that the picture he sent made her have to cross her legs.

She unknowingly and regretfully ended up sending:

we need to talk.