Shadows of The Past

Chapter 10

Bella's POV

One thousand, two thousand, three thousand. One thousand, two thousand, three thousand.

"Bella?" I heard Edward's voice in a distance. I didn't look up at him as I continued measuring the interval time between each light flicker on the overhead lamp.

"Baby." Edward whispered. I felt the side of the bed sink down and I knew Edward had settled down next to me. "Bella, look at me."

I reluctantly turned to the side to see Edward's flawless face. I could tell that he hadn't been sleeping for the past few nights either. I got up from my lying position and sat closer to Edward where his arms were already open for me to snuggle into.

"You look tired." I mumbled against his chest.

"Don't even get me started on how exhausted you look." Edward placed his chin on the top of my head.

I laughed dryly before looking up at him. "It has been a month since we knew about the news and I still can't get over it." I murmured. "I feel like I'm at fault."

Edward cupped my face with his hands. "It's not your fault, Bella. Stop beating yourself up for it. These kind of things happen."

"What are we going to do?" I sighed.

"Well, there is adoption." Edward pulled my head to his chest. "I'm not forcing it on you but it is an option."

I stayed silent for a few minutes, taking it all in. Edward had brought up the topic of adoption quite a few times now and at first I was totally against the idea but now, it didn't seem that bad. And frankly, it was the only choice we had since I didn't want to try surrogacy either.

"There's a place in Seattle right?" I spoke up after some time.

"Yeah there is. We can go check them out first, then if we like what we see, we can register." Edward's arms around me tightened.

"Sounds like the only plan left for us." I mumbled.

"Bella," Edward pulled away to see my face. "The sky's the limit remember? That didn't only apply to us when we were 18."

"I know." I smiled. "Thanks for being the greatest husband ever." I leaned up to kiss Edward.

"I love you." Edward whispered against my lips.

"I love you too." I replied as I gently stroked Edward's face. "Maybe we could get some sleep tonight."

~~

I stared out of the car window as Edward and I drove down to Seattle. Our favorite Debussy was playing in the car and I knew Edward chose this song because he was as nervous as I was. Emmett and Rosalie had supported us in our decision of adopting and even though Alice had yet to get back to us, I knew we had her support from wherever she was right now.

"I think it's this turn." I muttered as I stared down at the GPS in my hands.

Edward faintly nodded and turned into a small street. It was empty and looked a little like a scene from a horror movie. Edward drove down slowly as both of us looked out for the adopting agency. Eventually, it wasn't that hard to find as there was a huge banner filled with baby faces hanging outside a two storey shophouse.

"You think this is it?" Edward asked as he clutched my hand.

"Yeah it seems like it." I kept my eyes on the building outside as I placed the GPS device in the glove department. "We should go in."

Edward let go of my hand as he shifted the gear to parking mode. He pulled up the handbrake and turned to look at me. "Let's go, love."

Edward and I got out of the car together and walked into the building hand in hand. I took in a deep breath as we walked through the threshold. The place had both a homely feel and a modern touch. I saw many ladies walking around with files and clipboards in their hands and I gulped.

"Good afternoon, how may I help you?" A sweet voice came from in front. I looked up and saw a middle aged woman standing at the reception.

"Hi, we are the Cullens and I think I called just now regarding the-" I started.

"Oh yes! I remember." The lady interrupted me as she started clicking on a few things on her computer. "Wait a moment, dear."

I scanned the room one more time as I waited for the lady to finish whatever she was doing on the computer. Edward was stiff beside me and I could only imagine how he was feeling. I stroked the back of his hand with my thumb as a way to calm the both of us.

"All right, Dr Jen will see you now. This way please." The lady at the reception cooed.

Edward and I walked right behind her as we entered a new set of hallways. I peeked into a few rooms and some of them had infants inside while the other rooms had kids from varying ages. Soon, we reached another room and someone stepped out of it right as we reached the door.

"Mrs Smith, here are the files you asked for. Go through them one more time before informing Marcus about it. I want to know who the parents are." A lady who I assumed to be Dr Jen spoke in a rushed manner. She turned to us within half a second and a small smile formed on her lips. "My next clients?" She asked with an eyebrow raised at Mrs Smith.

"Yes doctor." Mrs Smith nodded before smiling at both Edward and I. Before I could return the smile, she turned away and walked back down the hallway.

"Come on in." Dr Jen waved us in as she entered her office first. "You guys are the," she paused to look at a thick binder on her table. "Cullens, am I right?" She asked.

"That's right." Edward nodded.

"Great. Hi, I'm doctor Jennifer but feel free to call me Jen." She gestured for us to take a seat opposite her. "You both are interested in adoption, yes?"

"Yep." I looked at Jennifer. "You have a lot of kids in here."

"The number just keeps going up." She sighed. "I've read your file but as a psychiatrist, I am obliged to run a few psychological tests on you both before I can register your names with the agency." Jennifer looked down at a pile of papers. "It should be relatively easy I'm pretty sure you both will do just fine." She assured us with a smile.

"How long will the whole process take?" Edward asked. "I mean, to get a baby."

Jennifer leaned back against her chair. "It actually depends on a lot of factors. Some couples can get their babies in a few weeks while others can wait up to a year. Your financial status, housing facility and your psychological well being plays a huge part. We strive to give couples the right baby that can adapt and grow well with them so we have to be really careful about this." Jennifer explained.

My grip on Edward tightened. "A year? Really?" I couldn't hide the desperation in my voice.

"I'm afraid so. But not to worry, I'm sure you'll be blessed with a baby soon." Jennifer smiled. "So, shall we kickstart the process?"

Edward and I exchanged a look before both of us looked back at Jennifer. "We are ready."

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