Something's Changed Because of You

"Discovering"

Neyudia's POV

I went to a spot where the ocean would glow so beautifully. I made sure he caught up with me. Once we got there he looked enchanted by the view. I sat down against a tree as he sat close to me.

"I like to come here to silence my mind and relax," I said.

There was a good breeze in this area and I let it flow in my hair. I noticed from my peripheral vision he was looking at me. I turned my head to face him.

"You can talk to me Neyudia I know you're very closed but I'm always here," he said.

I exhaled deeply as I ran my hands in my hair. Ever since he came it's like I felt real emotion now. I didn't know whether I liked it or not. I felt my hands start to shake. I hated when that happened. I felt so pathetic. He grabbed my hand to help with the shaking.

"I've been through a lot and when I saw my mother had you I got scared. I didn't want to be responsible for another death. I'm already guilty because of one I didn't need another on my shoulder," I said.

I felt like I could trust him that he wouldn't betray me. I felt safe, comfortable with him.

"I may not fully understand but I know the weight you have to always be protecting everyone. I'm the older brother so I'm responsible for my siblings and if Eywa decided to take them it would be on my hands," he said.

"I guess we both can understand something about each other," he said.

I looked up at him. I always thought he had a perfect life but if he did he wouldn't be here hiding for his life. When he mentioned being the older brother it reminded me of when I was an older sister. How I failed taking that part, that responsibility. I felt tears welling up in my eyes.

I had to get out of here now.

"It's late, we need our rest," I said.

"Neyudia-"

"Goodnight Neteyam," I said as I went on my way.

I ran to my marius. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I broke down while holding my hand aganist my mouth. I hated remembering it , I hated feeling guilty, I hated making that mistake, I hated everything.

The flashback wouldn't go away. I curled up and had my hands on my head cradling back and forth.

Stop.

Stop.

Go away.

Stop it.

Shut up.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Flashback:

"You kids need to stay here okay," said Ronal.

Once she left, I sneaked out to see what was going on. I lost her I had to find her. There was so much blood, fire, and dead bodies. I had a knife and my bow with me just in case. My father had gifted me the bow and taught me for my own defense. It was time to put it to use.

"La'lin!"

"Neyudia!"

I heard her voice and ran to the direction where I heard her. As I was on my way someone grabbed me. I got my knife out and stabbed him in the neck. I stood there for a while thinking about what I had just done. I didn't look back I didn't have time. She needed to be saved. I needed to save La'lin. I continued running until I saw her. There was sky people. One of them had her by the throat. I hid behind a tree so I could shoot him from afar.