Crossfire Queen

41.

I awoke to the sounds of raised voices outside my room. It was still dark so I assumed it was probably still night time. "I heard the conversation." Tony's voice whisper shouted. "Alessia could be lying" Lorenzo hissed back. "Why would she lie to her. She has no reason too" Tony defended my friend. "To protect him. To make her less angry at him. Because of him" Lorenzo reeled off annoyed. They were clearly talking about Marco. "If what Sofia told me is true, if Marco purposely aimed at Ro there must be a reason" Tony stammered. "I was there son. Romero could've been me, or anyone else. Marco shot him because he could" he huffed. "Sofia knows him best. Better than any of us. If she's telling us he would only shoot Romero for a reason I don't think we should just ignore that" Tony sighed. "I know luca appreciates your counsel Tony but do not forget who you're talking to" Lorenzo said sharply. "What if Ro was playing both sides. What if Marco shot him because he hadn't kept Sofia safe?" Tony ignored his warning. "What if isn't substantiated Tony. If I went around shooting people on What if's I'd have a whole graveyard named after me" he said curtly. "In any case there is no evidence that Ro is playing both sides" he added. "He's been sketchy as fuck since she got here" Tony said quickly. "He has been way more tense, he pushed her down the stairs" he added. "Probably because Marco decided to have his fiancé murdered" Lorenzo spat back. "Why though. Why would Marco murder his fiancé for no reason." Tony retorted. "Sofia said" he began only for Lorenzo to cut him off. "That he only kills for a reason - I heard you." The boss said snappily. "But how do we know that she isn't feeding us what he wants her too. How do we know she isn't being fed what he wants her to be fed" Lorenzo continued in a fury as Tony stood their mute.
Lorenzo's distrust in me was warranted but still it felt like a blow to the stomach. Is that how everyone felt, that I was Marcos puppet, that I was controlled by him. "If you don't trust her why are we keeping her here" Tony asked seriously. "We don't turn our back on family, under any circumstance" Lorenzo sighed. "Not even betrayal" Tony quipped. "Even then" Lorenzo said with a sigh as I closed my eye and let a tear escape.
They would never turn there back on Romero, even if he had hurt me, betrayed me. Betrayed luca. Family meant more than loyalty clearly. Lorenzo wouldn't shun his nephew for me, Luca wouldn't shun his cousin turned best friend for me. If Romero did wake up, I'd be his puppet and I'd probably still die at his hands anyway.
Just thinking about his hands on me had my body tensing and my head pounding, the door slamming open was the last thing I heard before I was succumbed back into darkness.
I awoke to the steady beating of my heart, I still hadn't completely succumbed to Romeros intentions. "Took your time" Louisa said as i fluttered my eyes open. "Another one" I sighed as she nodded. "Tony said you were asleep, maybe you had a nightmare" she said sadly. "Maybe" I replied, not wanting anyone to know I had been awake and therefore heard the entire conversation between Lorenzo and Tony. "Gave me quite the fright" Tony's voice said on my other side as I offered him a soft smile. "Sorry" I said sadly, apologising in more ways that one. "Don't be. Can't be helped" he shrugged. "I did let Luca know, but he's still tied up with Ro" Tony smiled sympathetically at me. "I understand" I nodded at him as he gave me a short smile. "He should be with you" Louisa sighed looking at me knowingly. "He would be" she said almost warningly. "No" I shook my head. "He wants to be with Ro, he means more" I said firmly. "He wouldn't though" Louisa said knowingly. He wouldn't if he knew. Is what she wanted to say but couldn't. "He's known Ro his whole life Sofia. Don't take it personally" Tony countered. "I won't" I said with a soft smile. "Just an observation" I added as he nodded. "How can you be so fucking blasè" Louisa groaned. "Please stop" I mumbled as I closed my eyes trying to imagine a beach with a sunset. Anything to take my mind off my current situation. "Lou" Tony said confused, almost disgusted at her outburst. "I'm sorry Sof, but I can't pretend any longer" she said throwing her pen down and storming out. I gulped knowing I couldn't go after her. Tony looked confused as he sat looking between me and the door Louisa just stormed out of. "Want to tell me what that was about" he asked curiously. "Not particularly Tony no" I sighed as I turned away from him. "You know you can talk to me." He said gently but I was too wound up. "What so you can run and tell Lorenzo." I scoffed. "Give me a break. You're not here for me, you're here because Luca put you here. To watch me. To check I don't run to Marco. Which for you information I wouldn't do" I said as tears began to stream down my face. If before it felt like the world was crashing down around me, now it felt like the entire weight had fallen on me suffocating me slowly. Painfully. If only they knew Marco had come to me, begged me to go with him and I hadn't. If only they knew that the war had broken out because one of theirs had hurt me. If only I could tell the truth but instead I was caught in this web of lies and everything was just wrong. Gulping for breath I prayed that Louisa wouldn't tell anyone about Romero. If she did and he woke up I would be in a worse position. Everyone knowing it was him would put me in a worse position. They wouldn't turn their back on family. They won't and never will trust me. "Sofia Breathe" Tony instructed as I found my breath racing. "Fuck Sofia please" he begged. "I'll go get lou" he said running out the room as I felt my lungs sucking in less and less air as I hyperventilated more and more. The weight of the world crushing itself on my lungs as I fought for breath. Maybe suffocating like this would give me release from this world. 'But if you die now, Romero will have won.' My overactive brain span. 'If you stay alive he'll only kill you anyway' the other half of my brain countered as my breaths became more like pants, my airways constricting more and more as my eyes frantically searched the room for anything that would help me. Glancing beside me there was an oxygen tank, the same one Lou had put on me last night. That's what I needed, oxygen. As my eyes began to fog, I scrambled to work out how to use it, a hissing finally coming out as I placed the mask on my face and continued to breathe rapidly as i crouched forward, hoping the gas would give me some penance. It didn't seem to be doing anything though. I felt light headed, tears rolling down my eyes as I clawed a hand to my tight chest praying this would stop. "Sof" the soft voice said as he wrapped me in his arms. "Breathe" he said worriedly. "Please breathe" he encouraged as I looked at him my head rolling slightly. "Find lou" he instructed as he looked at me, holding my head still as my lungs worked overtime. "Breathe" he begged. "I can't loose you" he said softly. "Please sof" he continued as his hand caressed my cheek. "That's it" he said as I tried to take a deeper breath. "Keep going, breathe for me" he said warmly. "I'm right here, I'm not going" he said as I felt myself relax ever so slightly. "Breathe, in and out" he continued. "You've got this" he said softly as he too took big breaths. For every one he was taking I was cramming four in still. It was slower but still not slow enough. "Nice and slow, I've got you" he encouraged as I attempted again to take a deep breath, more air entering my lungs than they previously had. "Another one" he said as I did as instructed, feeling slightly less woozy with each big breath he suggested. "That's it" he encouraged. "Just take it easy" he said softly as the door burst open again. "Ignore them, I've got you" he said gently as I tried my best to focus on him. "Another deep breath" he said supportively as I followed his instruction shakily. "You're doing great" he said as he let go of my head and brushed my loose hair behind my ear. "Keep breathing" he said softly not letting me go. "I don't think I would cope if you stopped" he said softly as I paused my breath to slowly gulp. "Don't look so frightened" he chuckled slightly. "You won't be stopping on my watch" he said gently. Little did he know, it probably would be on his watch, at his best friends hand.
"I need to put her monitoring back on" Louisa said quietly as Luca stayed put in front of me. "Sure" he nodded as I looked at her for a brief second. "Can I listen to your chest" she asked as I nodded not wanting to speak. Speaking to her in the first place had been a mistake. Her knowing my secret made me more vulnerable. As the cold metal was placed on my chest I flinched, only to have Luca hold my hand instinctively. "It's cold" I said quietly. "Sorry" Louisa said as she listened. The quietness swirled around me, as my body yearned to be closer to luca. But whilst she examined me I had to stay out. "You're chest is clear. I think it was probably a panic attack" she said looking at me sadly as I nodded. "Sorry Sof" she added as I shook my head. "I'm sorry too. I wish I wasn't, wish it wasn't such a burden" I said as she shook her head and pulled me into a hug. "I didn't say anything" she whispered as she held me. "But it's killing me sofia" she added before letting go as I gulped. "You're not a burden" she said as she stood in-front of me. "Given what's just happened, I think it would be safest if she stays in here till lunch" Louisa said turning to her brother. "Okay, let dad know if he needs me I'm in here" Luca said as he sat himself back on the bed before pulling me next to him. "What about Romero" I stuttered looking at him. "He's stable, thank god" he sighed. "Let's focus on you now, I'll worry about everyone else later" he said as I gulped, before placing my head on his chest. "Romeros stable" Louisa asked surprised. "Yup, they had to operate again but he's made it through. Still comatose but they're hopeful" he said as I shivered in his arms. "Lou pass me a blanket she's cold" he asked softly of his sister as she nodded and placed a blanket over the two of us. In here it was just us three. I knew sleeping beside him was risky with Romero still ticking along. But I didn't have the energy to fight it. Not right now. "I promise I'm not going anywhere" he said looking down at me before placing a soft kiss on my head. "Not until your discharged" he added as I snuggled further into him. "Thank-you" I mumbled before closing my eyes, as he gently traced a heart on my hip with his finger.