Shade Of Pink ✔️

❄️letter; A favor❄️

I still couldn't come to term with everything happened around me, and thing keep happening rapidly within heart beat.

"I don't know if I'll see you again"

I said to Rahil who had been holding unto my hands in hers for way to long,

"You will, and you will be fine too Zahra please"

Her voice sounded edgy as though she was seconds away from crying but she held it back well in an attempt not to make me cry too, which made me smile  leading to the thought of how i was even going to be fine.

Taking in a deep breath nodding my head, then tapping on our hands gently with a fake smile which she didn't see through and engulfed me in a warm hug, I almost felt like crying out my heart just maybe the pains I was having around my chest was going to subside but I held it in.

And it felt like forever until one of the royal maids came in making us pull back only for me to see Rahil lashes wet from tears she wiped out.

"Common am fine as you can see, you should get going am sure she came to remind you"

Sure I had to let go but I don't want to if only we could switch places with Rahil then I'd be so glad, but I knew nothing of such was happening and the earlier I pull my shit together only then will, I make my life worth living.

"Please keep your promise and give this"

I paused not knowing how to address the said person but it was as if she got the menu and took the white envelope from my hand with a smile, "I never made a promise to someone am keeping your promise, I'll always be here"

She said setting her lips in a tight line just so she could show me her sincerity but I knew she was keeping her words maybe not until she hears what I want her to do.

I didn't want my thought to go hire wire but seeing I have nothing to do or even a company made it more harder on me, and I blinked the tears letting them fall what started turned into a full blown sob making my shoulder shook vehemently,I feel sick and suicidal it was as if nobody wanted me here.

Not the person I was tied down to nor his family none of them where welcoming, so I had myself locked up in a room to obverse some alien traditions for 50 days, I won't be allowed to have direct contact with the sun and am only allowed to wear white as the future queen more like the crown princess I had to sit and wait.

Do I actually want this for myself, I asked deep within knowing what the answer was and how my life was going to be from now on I couldn't help but break into sob.

Days keep passing and not once did I get a glimpse of my husband, should I even address him as that whatever the case was, I wanted to ask him what he was planing todo with me, but I waited and it yield nothing.

Not until my 40 days, my days of imprisonment seemed to be getting close to it end which I was elated about but soon my bubble shell seemed to bust sooner than I thought.

My marriage must be consummated within those ten days just so I could be confirm a virgin, pure and fit to be the next queen.

It was the tradition I know I had no other option but to carry just like I did with the rest, jalil who was my said husband came on the 9th night which was termed as the special night, all the things happened seemed to be like In Some movie but here I was living those type of slavery lifestyle.

He didn't came to me that night but on the 9th night which I found out he was intoxicated, he only lunched unto me like some hungry lion ready to devour his prey and left me wounded all over, it hurt to be ripped off my pride the way my said husband did just brutally not only did he left me broken but he shattered the remaining pieces of my heart into shreds.

Living me to tend to myself the next morning he was no where to be found, and that was when realization drawn upon me that he also wasnot interested but had no other option, I overheard the maids while I was taking my bath talking about how he rapped one among them but she was threatened not to speak about it and later left the place.

Was I actually married to a monster I thought to myself, should I leave while I still could or what, I was confused in a dilemma not knowing what to do I couldn't ask anyone for advice not my birth mother who obviously choosed her marriage over her daughter, I know Rahil was going to Advice me on leaving but do I want to bring much shame upon my family.

What do you think

Does jalil name ring in your ears,
Well his the one from fear and storm, you can add it up to know about there life.

Well I suffered from this writers block which I fought for a whole week all thanks to Korean movies.

I wished wrapping this book before Ramadan but 😩😫 having 11 days left let's see if I can still make it.

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Aleeyu zaynab
17-9-2023