Clarity -Zedd
'Cause you are the piece of me I wish I didn't need
Chasing relentlessly, still fight and I don't know why
If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?
If our love's insanity, why are you my clarity?
~
Ashton didn't get the chance to talk to Delilah again that night. Due to her constant need to avoid him after embarrassing herself like that, the moment he would see her head over other people and start making his way in her direction, she'd practically disappear.
She went home with Michael that night, pretending like her relationship wasn't at its end, and as if everything was completely okay between the two of them.
Delilah called her dad that morning to let him know she wasn't coming home for break. She may have lied and said she wanted to get more studying in, but overall she just didn't want to have to go home and pretend everything was okay there too. At least at school she could focus on the songs she had been trying to write in her free time.
As soon as Ashton heard from Alexis that the red haired girl was staying at school for break, and Michael wasn't, he called his mom to apologize that he had something to take care of at school that weekend. And even though she wanted to see him, she could tell in his voice how important it was to him.
Once everyone had packed up and gone home for the weekend, the oldest boy knew that was his opportunity to talk to Delilah about anything and everything all at once. But at her apartment door, fist raised to knock, he hesitated. Would she even want to talk to him?
Still, he knocked and waited patiently while he heard footsteps from the other side. Starting to grow nervous about what the girl would remember from the night before. Would she remember her admitting to Michael cheating on her? That Ashton turned her down, regretting it as soon as he saw the look on her face?
As the door opened, the girl's eyebrows furrowing almost instantly, she parted her mouth to speak. "Ashton? I thought you went home with everyone else?"
He smiled softly, taking in the hungover mess of a girl in front of him. How could she look so good with her hair a mess, makeup all under her eyes, and an oversized t-shirt hanging on her body like a dress? "I have a few things I wanted to take care of while no one was here to distract me." He chuckled lightly, shaking his head. "Then I remembered you mentioning you might be staying on campus."
"Yeah." She nodded, bridging the ice pack she was holding back to her head. "Did you uhm- did you need something?"
"Mostly wanted to check on you, you were pretty drunk last night and after we talked I didn't see you much so I-"
"I went home with Mike and stayed over there." She whispered, avoiding his gaze. "I'm sorry for what I did last night, it's blurry but I know I crossed a line."
"We all say and do things when we're drunk we don't mean to." He offered a smile, sighing quietly. "I wanted to apologize too, I'm not sure how much you remember from last night but uh- after you kissed me and started trying to unbutton my shirt..." He trailed off, watching the color drain from her face before tinting pink again. "Anyways, you ran off before I could say anything else."
She finally looked up at him, meeting his eyes once more before taking a quiet breath. "What's up, Ash?"
"I didn't want to stop you." He whispered, finally admitting it out loud. "I wanted to do whatever you wanted at that moment but you were drunk and you're with Michael, and I just didn't want to be that guy."
YOU ARE READING
Paradox • afi
Fanfiction"I didn't think you'd ever want to actually pick up that guitar again." The younger of the friends spoke quietly as Ashton sat at his drums. "Let alone sit at your old drum kit. What changed?" Her. He couldn't admit it. Knowing damn well his reason...
