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Spread out diagonally across my double bed, with my legs flung over my best friend, Darren, I listened to him natter about how this year was going to be different, that we were new people, mature, and putting ourselves out there. We weren't going to be at the bottom of the social pyramid no longer, and we were to 'put our delicious selves out there' as Darren so amusingly put it.
Quinni and I giggled like children as Darren kept it serious, rolling his eyes at our laughter. "Seriously bitches, you know how I feel about people that aren't us... but I want to have some fun this year." Darren shrugged, I glanced over at Quinni, a wide grin on her face. She always had this innocent, beautiful smile, Darren and I couldn't help but melt at her wholesome features.
"Well, Darren, I think you might of been having a little bit too much fun already, ay" I winked, smacking his arm in a playful gesture. He'd recently been hooking up a boy from the private school across town, a scandalous romance like from the movies. Darren started sexually moaning, in a playful manner, causing us to laugh so loudly I'm sure Dougie had turned his music up to drown out the sound of us.
Thinking back to when the summer started, i smiled into my mirror. So much had changed over the summer holidays... Darren had come out as non-binary, and I was so proud of them. Though it took some people longer to get used to than others, I was so unbelievably proud of Darren. Quinni had come so much more into her style, and every time I see her she never ceases to amaze me with her creative flare in her style.
I feel like in these short six weeks, they had grown so mature. Yet I still felt like plain, old me. Still the same long, boring brown hair and the doe eyes to match. The same rose tinted lips and feeble build. The same wide hips and ample thighs that still made me feel a little insecure after all these years, though Darren says,
'Babe, it's 2022, thick thighs and self love is the whole moment'
Darren always knew how to make me feel better about everything, they always knew the right thing to say when it needed to be said. If I could have anyones confidence and kind heart, it would be Darren's.
Over the summer, Darren was determined for change. And so, I stood in front of my wardrobe and sighed deeply. It was daunting staring at all the new clothes that had not had the pleasure of being worn. I tried desperately to beg Darren and change their mind...
'Please Darren, don't throw them away. I love my clothes, I don't want a style awakening'
'Girl, this is happening, whether you like it or not'
And now, in a desperate bid for a fresh start this term, I had found myself in this position. All these clothes, and not enough confidence to wear them. Skirts, dresses, baggy jeans, blouses and crop tops. coloured and patterned pieces of clothing I never would've dreamed of wearing a year ago, staring at me.. mocking me and my dull style. Darren had said I'd needed to get more with the times, and the times I shall get with if they had anything to do with it.
After considering every possible piece of clothing, I'd finally settled on a white romper playsuit, that hugged the top half of my body nicely, while flowing elegantly at the bottom. I pulled on an oversized mint green cardigan, detailed with large daises.
"At least he let me keep my shoes." I joked to myself, pulling on my black platform doc martens. I tied the top of my hair back into a small white bow and made my way out of my bedroom, I was met with Dougie and nanna in the kitchen.
"Get the fuck out of here, ay, you'll be late for school" nanna exclaimed, not even looking up from the crossword on her newspaper. I rolled my eyes, slinging my backpack over my shoulder. Nanna always had a way with words.
"Bye nanna." Dougie and I said in unison, making our way out of the house. Walking towards Dougie's motorcycle, he handed me a helmet. He'd always make me wear it, even if he didn't wear one himself.
"I can't believe you have to repeat this year Dougie, that literally sucks so many balls." I stated, making Dougie chuckle and shake his head as I hiked my leg over the back of his motorcycle.
"Well, we're in the same year now, we can be besties." He joked, making me laugh. Dougie was quiet, he had his secrets and he had his friends outside of school and kept to himself otherwise, but I knew he was a sweet boy. Nobody knew him, not really, nobody took the time to get to know Dougie. He was just Cash the drug dealer to most people, though not me. I held onto the back of my seat as we started to make our way to school.
It's a brisk journey to school, and in a few mere minutes we'd made it into the car park. This is where Dougie and I part ways, not to see each other until we'd meet for the journey home. This is where Dougie becomes Cash. I climbed off the bike, passing him his helmet and shot him a smile, before making my way into the gate.
I spotted Darren and Quinni, looking bright and polished ready for a new year and headed towards them. I was known to be quiet, and good. I came to school, did my work and went home. I did my best to not draw attention to myself, especially in high school. Like any other girl, I had my crushes and a couple good friends. like any other girl, I'd had my fair share of rude comments and laughs as I passed by. In hindsight, I was not particularly outgoing and I didn't attempt to make friends outside of the ones I had.
What I needed, I already had.
As I continued my journey in, I looked up to see Dusty Reid in front of me.
What even the fuc-
"Hey Daisie, how was your summer?" He said softly, glancing me up and down before meeting my eye and giving me a kind smile. I stayed quiet for a moment, glancing behind him to see his entourage watching him, wondering...
Why on gods green earth is he talking to that?
I swallowed, and returned his smile. "Uh, yeah, it was.. it was fine." I replied, glancing up at him for a couple seconds before I walked away, excruciatingly awkwardly, may I add.
I heard Spider and Ant laugh at the awkward encounter. "uh, uh... spit it out." Spider mocked as I walked away. He was awful and never failed to make a crude comment in the hopes of embarrassing or offending somebody, though he hardly took any notice of me. I don't even think he knew my name, actually, I don't even think he knew that I went to this school until literally just now. Just as well, I'd rather be unknown to the world than a target.
Approaching Darren and Quinni, I listened to him shout to Amerie Wadia, calling her rude, though she didn't seem take any notice of them. "Did you see that? What a pick-me bitch." Darren stated to me, his arms crossed as i came to his side. "Maybe she didn't see us" Quinni replied.
"Oh please, check the material. We are beautiful, exquisite jellyfish. Of course they saw us." Darren linked our all our arms together as he started to walk towards the building, ready to take on a new year.
I had a good feeling about this year, like change was coming and I was going to be happ-
"Oi! There's a fully gacked sex map in the old stairwell!"
