Apodyopsis: Built for sin (GxG)

Apodyopsis-BFS 27

Rivianna Avril Samonte

She's now leaning on her bedrest and she has already calmed down. Hinayaan ko muna siyang umiyak kanina hanggang sa tumigil siya. I didn't say anything because I had no idea what was going on. I don't want to worsen things by saying anything. Plus, I'm waiting for her to tell me what happened.

Nandito lang ako nakaupo sa dulo ng kama habang taimtim na hinihintay siya. I lay down with my feet propped up on the bed. I want to say something, but I'm too afraid to open my mouth.

Should I say anything random, or should I just stay still and wait for her? Ano ba ang mga ginagawa sa ganitong situation? I am not really good at this. Ngayon nagsisisi na ako kung bakit puro kalokohan lang ang alam ko.

I faked a cough. "Are you ok—"

"Let's have sex."

Mabilis na napa-upo ako habang literal na nakangangang nakatingin sa kaniya. She was just staring at me straight in my eyes. No emotion at all.

"Wait." Naguguluhan kong saad at inayos ang pagkaka-upo ko paharap sa kaniya. "Are you serious?"

To be honest, I'm not sure how I feel. This is what I want, so I'm meant to be happy. I want her. But no, I'm not happy. It's a mixed bag of feelings. She is not fine; she is vulnerable at the moment kaya hindi ko alam ang ire-react ko ngayon.

"If you don't want to, just go." Malamig niyang turan.

Her eyes were lifeless. What really happened to her? Although I'm accustomed to her icy side, this one is unusual. Her eyes have no life in them. Boses niya, expresion niya walang pagkakaiba sa titig niya.

I sighed and crawled over to her. I'm now on my knees beside her. "Kiss me."

Umangat ang tingin niya sa'kin at tinitigan. I tried to read by staring at her, but I couldn't. She is like a sheet of blank paper or a pitch-black space. I was unable to discern her thoughts. Ang hirap niyang basahin.

Medyo nagulat ako nang biglaan niyang hawakan ang kwelyo ng uniform ko. Napalunok ako dahil magkalapit na ang mga mukha namin. Kahit sa ganitong situation, hindi ko makakalimutan kung gaano siya kaganda. She's really beautiful kahit pa na para siyang walang buhay ngayon. Napadpad ang mata ko sa labi niya at agad binalik sa mga mata niya.

"Kiss me if you want me." I almost whispered.

Pinigilan ko ang sarili ko na ako ang mag-first move kahit na gustong-gusto ko na. Nabubuhay ang kahalayan sa katawan ko nang magtagpo ang mata namin, hindi pa nakakatulong ang amoy niya.

I bit my lower lip para pigilan ang sarili. I inhaled deeply to calm my nerves. But I think I made the wrong decision. Mas nahihirapan akong kontrolin pa ang sarili lalo na ngayon mas malapit kami, ramdam ko ang hininga niya na tumatama sa mukha ko. Her eyes that I couldn't resist any longer.

"Fuck." I groaned at mabilis na hinalikan siya.

My eyes closed involuntarily as soon as I felt her lips. I miss her sweet lips so much.

Lumayo ako ng bahagya. "Stop me, I might lose control of myself."

"Don't touch me." She said and pushed me on the bed. Nakapaibabaw na siya ngayon sa'kin. "I will please you."