GIRL GROUP | jjk

Chapter 26

"And then you're going to hold her hand," the production director, or PD, says to Jungkook, gesturing wildly into the empty air. He's a bulky man with a goatee, wearing all black and a flowy coat even though it's sweltering July. "And then, you're going to swoop her off her feet. Carrying her wedding style down the path towards the river. Got it?"

Her is very obviously me, but somehow I still can't believe it. Surely the PD means Jesstina and Nabi, not me. In terms of being romantic, I'm probably a two out of ten in showing it well on camera. Call it the awkwardness of never having a boyfriend before, but I just don't think it's a good idea for Jungkook and I to act like newlyweds in the middle of our second music video.

"PD," I say, inclining my head respectfully. "I just don't think it's appropriate for our music video."

"Of course it is," he says. "We all know what 'Greek God' is about. And you and Jungkook could really carry the theme."

"Everyone thinks of it as a heterosexual love story," Nabi mutters under her breath.

It catches me by surprise. Nabi is usually the first to be agreeable, but maybe Yuna's departure has all changed us in some way. Jesstina scoots over to Nabi, giving her a playful half-hug as if agreeing that the world we live in is too narrow-minded.

"Please reconsider," I say, speaking quickly in case someone questions what Nabi muttered. "Are you sure this is the right direction for our group dynamic?"

"Of course it is," PD says. "You two are together, right?"

I watch in horror as Jungkook nods. "I'm on board. As long as we follow the storyline of the lyrics."

Everyone on the team looks at me, and I can feel the pressure to change my mind like the ground is rising around me to swallow me. Even though I'm the leader of the group, we're not supposed to be so outspoken—especially as rookies. "Okay," I end up saying. "But if we can put a limit on the romance, that would be great."

"Let's begin," PD says, rubbing his hands together as if trying to create a spark.

Jungkook and I are beginning with a duo shot. As the camera pans over to us, I hold Jungkook's hand and try to ignore the suspicion that Nabi and Jesstina are having the time of their lives as observers.

Of course, naturally, I've imagined holding Jungkook's hand as if we can traipse through a crowd on our first date. But I never thought the day would ever come where I could hold his hand in public. Even after we agreed that we're "dating," it's still so hard for me to believe that we're actually together in some sense.

My hand fits in his easily, and the warmth of his skin transfers to mind—so much so that my whole body covers itself with a flush.

"We need you both to relax a bit more," PD says, shouting as the cameramen sidle up next to us.

Jungkook adjusts his hand, and at the same time, he whispers, "this is new to me too."

It unlocks a strange ember in me. Of course, I know that Jungkook definitely has had a crush before, maybe being in love. How else would he sing his lyrics with such genuine emotion? But maybe he means this—he's never been allowed to do this in public.

I imagine a person on the faraway bridge, snapping photos of us to be shared with millions around the world. It scares me. At the same time....

This is Jungkook. I knew that when I accepted him on my team, the Fates wouldn't be the same. Maybe Jungkook and I can be a couple, and maybe that's what our group needs. Still, it doesn't help the butterflies that are birthed in my stomach and flutter up into my lungs.