It's Complicated

Chapter 32

Jamie looked up at me and shrugged, "yeah aside from my girlfriend being an absolute train wreck and outing our relationship to your fiancé."

"Not that she should've brought that up," Jamie continued, "but I thought he knew."

I shook my head as I sat down next to her on the bench, "I haven't really had the need to tell him, but obviously I should have."

"I guess I just - I thought we could all be friends, but I can't do it," Jamie said.

I sat there quietly, not exactly sure how to respond.

"Now that you're back, I just can't stop thinking about how you just...you just left. Without even trying," Jamie said. I could hear a bite in her voice that wasn't there before.

"Jamie I apologized for that, I don't know what else you expect me to do."

I understood that all of this was bringing up old feelings, but I had to admit I was getting annoyed with how mad she was sounding. I waited for her to respond but she just sat there.

"The least that you could've done was apologize for what you said to me. I kept on thinking you would," I continued.

She stayed silent, so I stood up and got ready to go back inside and get myself out of this situation.

"What I said to you?" I heard Jamie ask as I turned to walk away.

I turned back around to face her.

"Yes Jamie. You keep telling me you hate how things ended but you've conveniently left out an apology for accusing me of using you as a 'drunken experiment.'" I was the one who had the bite in my voice now.

She stood up and took a step closer to me. "Well what did you expect me to think Cas? You left and acted like I meant nothing to you!"

"Meant nothing to me?" I snapped back.

"Do you want to know why I actually left Jamie?" I kept going, feeling the heat rise in my face.

"I left to save you from losing your fucking job!"

Jamie took a step back and looked at me. "I - you, you what? What do you mean?" She asked.

"If I didn't transfer out to California your firm said they were going to fire you. That was their solution. But yeah...you totally meant nothing to me." I turned back around and walked inside.

"Cas, hold on," I heard Jamie plead behind me.

I shook my head and kept walking. "I'm not putting myself through this shit with you again."

We walked back inside and I came up to the table and put my hand on Alex's shoulder.

"We need to go," I said quietly as he looked up at me.

Sophie looked from me to Jamie and then stood up to leave. "You okay Cas?" She said in my ear.

I nodded, "I'll call you later."

Olivia sat at the table sipping on her drink, obviously enjoying the show. She might be drunk but I was pretty sure she knew what she was doing.

Alex and I walked out to the parking lot in silence and got into the car. I sat there waiting for him to start it, but he turned to look at me.

"Cas, why didn't you just tell me?" He asked.

"I'm sorry, I know I should have. Jamie and I...it was a whirlwind and it didn't end well. I guess I was just trying to forget about it." I tried to explain myself and I wasn't sure how he was taking it.

"How long were you together?" Alex asked.

"I don't know that we were ever even really a couple. Things just got very complicated very fast," I said.

Alex nodded, but didn't say anything. He finally started the car and began to drive us back home.

We got back to the house and he still hadn't said much. "I'm really sorry babe," I said quietly.

He looked at me, "is there anything else you're not telling me?"

"I - well, yes." Might as well just get it all over with now.

Alex raised his eyebrows at me, that clearly wasn't the answer he was looking for.

"Jamie and I were together when we were opposing counsel on a case...and we didn't notify anyone and we ended up getting in a lot of trouble when they found out."

I kept going, just wanting to get everything out in the open. "That's why - that's why I moved out to California. They transferred me there to keep us both out of trouble."

"Jesus Cas," Alex said as he rubbed his eyes. "That's a lot."

I nodded, "like I said, very complicated very fast."

"I didn't expect to see her when we came back, especially not right away like I did," I said. "We hadn't spoken since I left. I didn't think she wanted anything to do with me."

I walked over to Alex and put my hands on his chest, "I should've told you right after we saw her for the first time, I know that."

He took my hands in his and slowly moved them off of him. "I just need a minute Cas, this is kind of a lot to hear in one night."

I stepped back and nodded, "I know, I'll give you your space."

I stepped outside on to our back patio to give Alex his space and to call Sophie and explain everything.

"Cas hey," she quickly answered, "what the hell just happened."

"So much shit," I responded. "Jamie was going on again about how I left her, so I told her about her firm wanting to fire her."

"Oh, damn," Sophie said. "How did she take that?"

"I don't know honestly, I was so mad at the whole situation that's when I walked away and came inside."

"Shit," Sophie said quietly, "well how is Alex taking everything?"

I sighed, "not well honestly, and I can't say that I blame him. I just got done explaining all of this shit to him and he said he needed a minute. So here we are."

"At least everything is out in the open now...right?" Sophie questioned.

"Yeah...I guess so, but who knows how it's all going to turn out."

I sighed and said, "Alright I gotta go, wish me luck."

I walked back inside and quietly went into the bedroom. I got ready and carefully climbed into bed.

Alex seemed to be sleeping already, so it made me jump when I heard his voice in the darkness.

"Do you still have feelings for her Cas?"

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