To Infiniti & Beyond

Chapter Forty-Three

Eva is with me today. I appreciate her tagging along with me to run errands, having her company just makes boring things like this more enjoyable.

On the way to the NAPA we blast throwbacks and scream-sing our hearts out.

Entering the store, we continue to hum and sing any songs that come to mind. When one of us starts, the other joins in without fail every time. We continue our personal concert as we browse the aisles for my oil and filter.

A short while later, we arrived back at my house. Ever since Eva got introduced to Elias, she's shown more of an interest in cars, and I'm more than happy to teach her what I know as well as learn alongside her. What I will say surprised me though, is the fact that her newfound interest in cars remained present even after her and Elias' little fling mutually fizzled out.

I show Eva how to chuck the back wheel seeing as we're not on a level surface. We then proceed to go to the front of the car, I have her help me line up the jack so we can raise the car.

It would've been easier to do this at my mom's boyfriend's shop, but I didn't feel like driving 45 minutes there and back. I look at it like this: Eva is learning about tools that are more common and accessible than if we were to use the shop's hydraulic lift.

She crawls under the car with me. Before we start to work, we burst out laughing because of how absurd the angle at which we're looking at each other is.

I show her where the bolt to drain the oil is, I tell her what the tools are and what size they are as we carry on. She removes the drain plug. I hum the jeopardy theme song while we wait for the oil to start dripping at a steady pace. When it finally does, she puts the plug back in and I then show her how to remove the filter.

When the new filter is on, we crawl out from under the car and I let her lower it. As she goes to walk around me, she brings her hand covered in oil up to my face and makes a swatch on my forehead. Before I can even process what she's done, she simply says "simba."

We blankly stare at each other before doubling over laughing, holding onto each other, practically trying not to piss ourselves. When we finally catch our breath, she lowers my car for me and moves the jack out of the way.

As I pour the oil into the funnel, I break the silence, "I know you don't like Grayson for how he handled things, but what do you genuinely think of him coming back into my life?"

She deeply inhales, "well..." and exhales. "Obviously none of us like what he did to you and how he handled things." I nod as I prop the oil up to finish drip draining.

She continues, "at the end of the day, you're going to do what you want to do." I timidly smile. "I swear to god, if he hurts you again though, I will show no mercy." My face heats as I smile, I know she means it.

Since Grayson has made a return to my life, Eva has had a hard time accepting why I've let him come back. We've bickered about it, but I know it's only because she wants the best for me and doesn't want me to get hurt by him a second time.

I don't know if he'll hurt me again, sometimes I question if he knew he was hurting me as he was doing it back then. The bottom line is, I won't know unless I try again.

The more I think about it, the more I want to try again. He adds so much value to my life. Having him come back has made me inexplicably happy. I feel a peace with him I have never felt with anyone else. He makes me giddy, but doesn't give me anxiety. I don't get jealous when other girls look at him because I can see he's only got eyes for me - the way he looks at me makes me feel like the prettiest girl in the world.

Am I scared he'll hurt me again? Absolutely. But I think I'm more scared of not giving him a chance. I don't want to have to deal with the "what if's."

I close the hood of my car and come to the conclusion that I want him. I just hope he still wants us...