Your only one

Atlantis

Atlantis- Seafretofficial

Y/N'S POV.

It's not that I didn't want to see her, it's not that I don't want her to have her room on the same floor as mine, it's not that I don't care about her anymore.

It's that her presence hurts me, it hurts me to look into her eyes and know that she is not mine, it hurts me to listen to her and know that she is not talking to me, it hurts me because I know that I hurt her by not telling her that I loved her back. It hurts me to smell her perfume without being able to get close to her neck and smell it up close, it hurts me to be close to her and not be able to hug her.

Physically it hurts me not to be able to hold her hand and intertwine our fingers, it hurts me to love her from afar.

That is why I have decided to ignore her, being ignored and only receiving silence from someone is one of the most violent ways to treat someone in my opinion. It doesn't need to be physical for it to be violent, it is simply the act of not making the existence of the other conscious to oneself.

It is completely eliminating the existence of someone who may be in front of you, silencing and ignoring someone, generates in that person anguish and frustration, for one thing I think that's why I find it so violent.

Despair, sadness, anxiety are also some of the factors that come with a simple act like this, don't get me wrong I don't want Lizzie to feel that from me, oh God of course not.

But I know that if I stay close to her I won't be able to keep my sanity, I will fall at her feet and with that I will make her life more at risk than it already is.

"you told me there was nothing going on between you and her" Damon says pacing back and forth in the room.
"I told you that because I didn't want to put her life at risk, besides how did you want me to tell you if your reaction to just thinking something was going on between us wasn't looking good for you?.... I didn't want to lie to you but I couldn't tell you the truth either".

He sighed as he continued walking around the room, I watched him sitting in one of the armchairs in the library.

"Okay I understand that my reaction would have made you not want to tell me, but I still pity you for not telling me, for not trusting me, I am your brother, your soul mate" Damon says now looking at me, I could see the pain in his eyes.

Damon and I are good at hiding our emotions and feelings, but he and I know each other very well, I can read through him and I know that what he tells me really hurts him.

"I'm sorry okay? I didn't mean to hurt you I was just thinking about protecting her" I said in my softest voice.
"I know."
"You forgive me?" I said looking into his eyes as my lips pouted.

He let out a chuckle.

"Of course sis" he says sitting down next to me "how are things between you guys? I felt tension a few minutes ago"
"Well I ended things" I said sighing.
"Why did you do that?" He said incredulously.
"I can't let her life be in danger, I have a lot of feelings for her" I confessed to him.
"You love her huh?" He says chuckling
"I do" I said chuckling too.
"I guess we both suck at love then," Damon says with a laugh.
"What happened with Elena?"
"Not much, we haven't had the time to talk" he says and I could notice the change in his expression that lasted seconds.

Anyone else wouldn't have noticed, but like he said he's my soul mate, I know him too well.

"Well mate, now she will be living here for a long period of time, so the time will come" I said.

He gave me a sympathetic smile and I did the same.

"I'm sorry for making you feel like you couldn't tell me what was going on between you" he says.
"It's okay, it doesn't matter now anyway, what had to happen already happened" I said standing up from the couch.