Okaaaay, I'm probably posting this way after the event actually happened, but whatever.
So basically, my friend invited me and some other peeps over for a bday sleepover.
We were bored, I suggested truth or dare. We played it for a little while, then ended up just taking turns asking the group questions.
Now, of course, one of the questions was 'who is your crush?'
Now, the girl I think I might kinda sorta be into just so happened to BE. THERE.
So, I just said 'Daveed Diggs' and laughed, but as soon as they looked away I was silently mouthing her name.
And another thing, when we were actually doing dares and it was my turn to dare someone, she was pointing at a guy in our friend group and laughing and going 'dare me to kiss him'
And I did. And I saw my crush kiss another person.
And yeah, I obviously know they meant the kiss as a joke (I hope at least) but it still upset me a bit.
I haven't dated, or liked anyone in six fucking years, and then I did like someone, and they literally asked to be dared to kiss another person!
I don't fucking know why I'm pissed. She's not into me. I don't blame her. I have no admirable qualities.
If she's reading this, hey. what up? I like you. And I sometimes type that out in messages to you and delete it before I accidentally hit send. When I send you blue hearts, I mean red hearts. When I tell you your parents are assholes, that's my way of telling you that you deserve a perfect world full of cats and Taylor Swift and Cameron Monaghan. I love you, and I want to tell you that so bad. But I'm a coward, so I don't. 💙
