Elena Unleashed

Heartbroken- Part 48

Dawn and Eva look at each other and start bouncing up and down like they just won the lottery... They run up to me and bear hug me! What is happening? They are... Happy? What the fuck are they thinking? How are they happy about this whole situation? I look at them perplexed as they go back and forth saying they are going to be aunties and how Ezra and the baby are going to be best friends... Are they insane... No, really are they fucking okay in the head. I am going to be a single mom, with no job and no savings.

Don't they know this is not a good thing. This baby is not going to have a daddy for God's sake! I know what it's like not to have a dad around. What if I end up being like my egg donor, she was a horrible mother. What if it's in my genes to be a horrible mom? It is one thing to ruin my life, but not this innocent little life growing inside me. I am not 'Mom" material. What will my baby think of me? Oh god... What the Fuck am I going to do?

"E, you can't look at this as a negative. This baby is a blessing!" Dawn says excitedly.

"I will reach out to my OB friend and he will get you in next week." Dawn informs me as she is texting away on her phone.

Seeing all four of the positive pregnancy results made me feel sick to my stomach. After seeing how excited the girls are and listening to them. I didn't really know how to respond, since I had a million and one things swirling around in my head. How do I tell them that I am a miserable excuse for a parent. I make horrible life choices over and over again, they know this. How are they so sure this is a blessing? I just can't think about this right now, I really can't.

It dawns on me that Sofie is not here. "Where is Sofie?" I ask both girls. They both look at each other and look over at me.

"She has been acting really weird lately E." Eva tells me

"Yeah, when she heard that you weren't coming last night she freaked out on us. She was texting someone and then left without even telling us." Dawn continued while shaking her head.

"Did I do something to make her mad? Maybe she feels neglected?" I ask them.

"Should we call her?" I ask.

"No" both girls reply in unison.

"She needs to get her head out of her ass. She has been acting like a jealous brat since you started seeing Jaxon." Eva said curtly.

Dawn gives Eva a look, then I notice Eva frown and look down. "Sorry" I hear Eva say softly.

I look at them with confusion written all over my face. I was about to ask them what they meant about her acting like a jealous brat?

When I hear a dinging sound that distracts me momentarily. Dawn looks down at her phone. It reminds me, I need to check my phone, Emma wanted me to go shopping with her, I am going to have to reschedule. There is no way on God's green earth I am going to be able to go shopping today, not the way I'm feeling. Plus, I am not ready to tell them about what transpired between Jaxon and I just yet.

I grab my phone and as soon as it turns on, the notifications keep going on and on and on. I have 302 missed calls and 89 texts from Jaxon and 2 calls from Emma. I wanted to read and listen to all of Jaxon's messages, but I didn't allow myself to. I just couldn't, I knew if I did just that I would fall right back into his trap. I deleted all of his messages, and I blocked his number. I cried for I don't know how long after that. Once I gathered myself some, I was able to send a text to Emma. I let her know that I won't be making it today due to being a bit under the weather. Which isn't a complete lie, I just don't want to burden them with all my bat-shit crazy life.

I decide to gather all my work equipment and package it up, along with the company car keys. I know myself and will try to use it as an excuse to go and see Jaxon. I need to sever all ties now.

"Eva, can you please take this over to Fed-Ex for me. I need it overnighted to Jaxon so he gets it Monday Morning, I can zelle you the money." I asked with tears in my eyes.

"Of course girl. Give it here, I will take it to fed Ex in a bit." Eva replies.

"Thank you," I say while trying to hold back my emotions.

Dawn and Eva are in the kitchen fixing breakfast, while I am sitting on the couch pretending to watch TV. When in reality I am having a panic attack trying to figure out what I am going to do. Fucking Hell, now I need to find a job and insurance to keep up with my doctor's visits. What if I can't find a job with insurance and I end up having to live on the streets because I was thinking with my vagina instead of my head. I need to start submitting my resume tomorrow. Jaxon didn't even come over last night to try to find me, not that I would have let him in, at least that is what I tell myself. He probably had to rush back to Olivia... Tears start to well up and I try to force them down, I am so tired of crying. Shit, I'm just so tired, my body feels so heavy and weak, I just want to sleep forever.

Oh my gosh, I almost forgot about Marc. Does he know about Jaxon and Olivia? Poor Marc is going to be devastated. He loves that filthy strumpet.

The knock on the door brings me out of my thoughts. I get startled and I ignore whoever is knocking at the door. Dawn comes out of the kitchen "It's probably Steves parents, they sent me a text letting me know they were on their way with Ezra." She informs me.

I don't move from my spot and just look up at her, I don't want to get up and deal with anyone right now. "I got it, just relax," she kindly tells me as she goes to open the door. I lay down and cuddle my throw blanket and try to close my eyes and take a little nap, at least I thought I was going to take a nap that is until I hear Dawn going at it with someone. I look up and I see Jaxon, looking haggard and desperate trying to get a word in while Dawn is letting him have it. He is begging Dawn and now a very angry Eva to please let him explain. All I can hear is the girls taking turns telling him off about what a scum bag he is. His eyes meet mine briefly as he tries to maneuver around the girls. Is that pain and desperation I see in his eyes. Why is he in pain? Is it because he got caught?

I can't sit here and let them fight my battles, I need to finish this now.

I get up off the couch grab the box I packed up with all his work equipment. I squeeze in between the girls and look up at Jaxon.

"Elena, please let me ex..." He starts to say, but I cut him off. "No, I don't want to hear it Jaxon. I say sternly, but there is no missing the pain and hurt in my voice.

"Here" I hand him the box." He looks confused. "Here is all the equipment you provided me with when you hired me as your PA. The car keys and a printed version of my resignation is in the box as well and you can have someone come and pick up the car from the parking garage, the sooner the better." I say to him as emotionless as possible, but I know I sound like a heartbroken penguin that just lost his soul mate.

"Elena, please...Just give me a chance to explain." He begs.

"There is nothing to explain, I saw enough last night, and I don't need to hear your bullshit stories. We are done, and if you would be so kind as to ship or send over my things that are at your home with Marc I would greatly appreciate it." I try not to sound forlorn, but I'm sure that I am failing miserably.

"There is nothing more to say Jaxon. This... thing between us was a mistake. I wish the best for you and Olivia. All I ask is that you respect my wishes and do not attempt to contact me anymore. He looks at me, searching my eyes for something, I don't know what exactly. I unconsciously hold my lower belly, his eyes go to where my hands went and I release my belly immediately. It looked like he was about to say something, but he didn't say another word, he just took the box and walked away.

As I watched him walk away and my heart shattered all over again. I literally felt my heart breaking. I wanted him to fight harder for us, but he didn't even come over last night, he waited until this morning to come see me. What, did he have to get a few more romps with Olivia in before he came over to try to sell me on his bullshit? I will not give anyone the power to betray and destroy me again, especially now. I have someone else I'm responsible for. I will not allow myself to be trapped by anyone else.

"Goodbye Jaxon". I whisper with tears running down my face and walk back inside. I feel my stomach churning, I run to my bathroom and throw up yet again. I feel so drained, and a little lightheaded, things start to spin then darkness takes over.