Guilty Pleasures

27- runaway

"Who do you think you are to yell at me, you homeless piece of shit?! Isn't your amazing father the one who caused all this mess?? Go yell at him if you're so desperate to present yourself as innocent" my mom continues.
Wrath, disdain, insanely absurd.

That's what this fight is. Absurd in every way possible. Ross takes a step back in disbelief. His demeanor snaps, the tears in his eyes threatening to fall any minute now.

"And now you're crying?! See. If I were to sit and cry just like you!! My son would fall apart. I unlike you have to do something to help my son get back to normal!! So before you throw your useless accusations and assumptions at people, work on yourself. You and your stupid eating disorder and you can't even hide it! You just-"

Oh the irony. The irony is screaming mother.

"MOM! STOP IT!" I scream closing my ears as if the world is experiencing a disastrous earthquake. Everything is falling apart. My mom has turned into this witch who blames teenagers for something they did not do. Ross has turned into this doll who has to pretend to smile like everything is okay with him.
  I can't do this. Everything's a disaster. I can't breathe.

"Let's get home and have our favorite pastry!"

"My legs are longer babes"

"I love you Austin Brooks"

"Darlin, I need you to look at me, yeah? Come on. I'm right here, just listen to my voice" I open my eyes and notice that I was curled up against the wall and Ross was in front of me smiling wide. Fake. All fucking fake. Everything is fake. Everyone is fake.

"There you go, let's get you to bed shall we?" He tries to pull me up. I push him away harshly, get up and leave the hospital.

Where was I going? I have no idea. I can't think of anyone or anything. I pull my phone out and go through my contacts. My top ones are obviously Ross and mom, the two people who are turning into something I don't recognise. I'm selfish. I know that I'm selfish for pushing Ross away and for blaming them as if it's their fault that they're agitated all the damn time.
  I can't help it. I can't. I'll be selfish. Just this once. Just this once. Until things get better.

~~~

"Hi.." It was barely a whisper.

"Hello Austin. Should we go?"

"Yes. Let's go" I get into the car and we pull off into the pitch dark night.

We don't talk anything. We sit in silence. It's peaceful. She gives me a pair of headphones and played some music. I did not question it. She did not ask for my opinions either. It was just monotonous acts.

"Hey, we're here" she said after a 20 minutes drive.

  We walk into the well lit hallway. It's a huge house, almost like a mansion. I notice the bright coloured couch facing opposite to the television. I notice the vibrant colours of the wallpapers stuck to the walls. I notice the kitchen. Probably my favorite part.
  This was a dreamhouse, not just a house.

"Take a seat, I'll get you something to eat and drink" Erica smiles and walks away.

Why was she the one that I chose to go to? When i despised her for quite a while. I don't really know. Like I said, I'm gonna be selfish. Just for once. Forgive me, or maybe not. But maybe this is my battle to fight. Involving people who I want to involve and who wants to be involved may seem like a good idea. Cooperation from everyone, that's a good thing right?
  Maybe not in this case. It's my fight. I'm not here with a plan. I'm here on impulse. But impulsive decisions sometimes make sense. Like now.