i wish i never met you | b.e.

affiliation

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2/4

lila's pov

i told billie i was going to end things with eddie today, but i'm honestly terrified to. like i genuinely have been relying on his cocaine to make me feel better and its starting to get to my head.

i don't want to be addicted

i can't be addicted

im still going to his house though, we need to end on good terms.

i said to billie that if i text her even just once when im out today, she needs to help me.

i got such a bad feeling from him last night and the way he was acting, i just feel scared.

the way he looked at me when his friends doubted i could snort the coke, he looked at me in a way where he would be so pissed if i didnt.

and the way we had something planned and he just disregarded it? he came to the park high and drunk and took me to a party without me saying if it was okay. i was supposed to end things with him. i was going to. but his addicted ass just had to mess it up.

and i don't know what it is, but whenever i see eddies friends and meet new ones, they ask about if im "some girl" and then eddie cuts them off in a second. i'm gonna ask him about that because i don't know what he's telling them and it's scaring me.

i finally make it to his house, and its a hot ass day so im dying. i knock on the door multiple times and he finally answers it.

"look who finally shows up!" he laughs but its not that funny.

what does he mean "finally?"

asshole.

i walk in and sit on his couch, completely ignoring him.

the bachelor is playing on the tv and theres a bunch of pepsi bottles on the floor.

eddie sits down next to me and puts his arm around me. i kinda shift where im sitting so he moves it off my shoulders.

i dont like him anymore

i dont like him.

i dont.

"want some coke?" he says, breaking the silence.

that's all he ever fucking wants to do

i pause, the bachelor monologues are playing quietly in the backgorund

"not today eddie, im trying to get off of it."

he shifts his position and it shows he got mad about that.

"why?" he seems to get kind of angry which scares me.

"i mean its not good to be addicted-"

his eyes widen.

"woah," he fake laughs, "nobody is addicted, not you, not me, nobody. dont worry girl-" he says as he starts to line up the coke on the table in front of me.

"eddie, no-"

"lila its fine, ill even go first if you want."

"no!" i stand up, ready to leave.

he stands up and scares me with his height. his eyes are piercing my face and i watch anger get to his head.

i immediately think of cash.