Castle's partner

Back

Two days later:

I'm back at Jenny and Ryan's.

Everyone has stopped by to see me, and I was especially glad when Espo came.

I'm laying in bed with nothing better to do. I'm still healing, and in a lot of pain.

My phone buzzes, and I reach over to look at it.

Oliver-
Hey my beautiful girlfriend! How are you doing? Can I come visit?

No, no! Ryan cannot know that we're dating, not yet.

I reply:
Hey Oliver. I'm actually in a lot of pain right now, and I don't want anyone to see me like this, but maybe later?

To my relief he says:
Sounds great! Sorry you're hurting. I hope you feel better :)

Just as I finish reading the text, Ryan walks in, my phone still in my hand.

"Hey watcha doing?"

"Umm...I'm not...nothing. I'm not doing anything." I stutter.

He raises his eyebrows.

"Ooookkk. I was just coming in to check on you. Are you doing ok?"

I force a fake smile on my face.

"Yeah I'm not in much pain."

"Mmm hmmm. So if I asked you to walk out to the kitchen you could?"

I nod.

"Ok. Let's go."

He holds out his hand and I tentatively take it.

I stand up slowly, ignoring the pain.

I take a step.

Only a billion more.

I make my way to the kitchen, and after what seems like years, I step foot on the linoleum.

I know I have tears in my eyes, so I avoid Ryan's gaze.

When he speaks, his voice comes out soft.

"Why do you do this to yourself? You don't have anything to prove."

With that, I let the tears flow.

"I just want to stop hurting."

He pulls me into a hug and I sob into his chest.

"Make it go away."

"I wish I could." His voice cracks.

Behind me, a door closes.

I turn around, and Espo stands with one hand on the doorknob, a horrified look on his face.

His mouth hangs slightly open, his eyes wide.

"Espo-"

My words are cut off as Espo turns and walks out, slamming the door behind him.

Now it's my turn to look shocked.
I look at Ryan, then at the door.

And I run.

"Wait! You can't-" Ryan calls after me, but I don't listen.

Bad idea, I know.

I can already feel the effects of the strain on my body, and I'm not looking forward to later.

I keep running, even down the stairs (stupidly) until I catch up to Espo walking down the street.

"Espo!" I call out as I latch onto him, collapsing into his arms.

He catches me inches before my face hits the ground.

I'm now oblivious to the hammering sensation in my ribs, the adrenaline rush I got still pumping.

I push myself upright, but his arms are still holding me up.

"Why'd you leave?"

I look at him, and he's holding back tears.

I put my arms around him, and he pulls me closer.

"All that pain...it's my fault. It's my fault you're in so much pain."

"You're still worried about that?"

"Of course I am."

"Ok Espo. Let's, for one second, pretend it was actually your fault."

He nods, and so do I.

"Ok. Ready? Let it go. There's nothing you can do about it right? It was an accident. If the same thing happened again, except this time we switched places, wouldn't you say the same thing?"

He looks at the ground.

"I guess."

"Then can you please drop it? For me?"

He pulls me in again and presses his lips to my forehead.

"Yes."

I breathe a sigh of relief.

"Thank you. Now can you do me a favor?"

"Of course. What?"

"Can you carry me back?" I whisper, ashamed I have to ask for help.

He picks me up gently, one arm under the backside of my knees and the other on my back.

I put my arms around his neck.

"Te amo Tío." I say softly, and he smiles at me.

"Te amo Sobrina."