Castle's partner

Soil

They fly us back to America, and the flight takes forever. I mean, I have flown to New York from California, and that was a long flight, but this took seven and a half hours.

Seven and a half.

It's exhausting.

Although, I do fall asleep for part of it.

Which is kinda sad, but I also don't want to talk right now.

Alexis is being overly clingly to me, which I understand, surprisingly.

I wake up when the wheels of the plane hit the landing strip and a reverberating sound can be felt along our seats.

We don't have to wait for luggage at the baggage claim.

Instead, Castle gets us a cab, and we head straight for his loft.

Don't get me wrong, I'm really happy to be home, but I'm nervous.

Alexis and Castle haven't stopped talking since we got in the cab, and continue as we walk into Castle's building.

I tug on the sleeves of my sweatshirt, courtesy of the U.S. Embassy in Paris. I pull them down below my fingertips.

The doorman pulls the door for us, and the elevator takes us to Castle's floor. We get off, and walk down the hall to his loft.

Castle hugs Alexis one last time before pushing the door open. Martha rushes for Alexis, and Beckett heads straight for Castle.

I back away, and head upstairs to wander around in the library next to Martha's room.

I'm not really looking for anything to read, I just need some time away from them.

I'm distracted by Harry Potter when Alexis walks in.

"You know, they haven't seen you yet. They want to." She says.

When I don't answer, she sighs.

"I don't know how you do it. I've been home for five minutes and they're already asking me questions I don't want to answer. I understand now why you don't talk about what happened."

"Alexis, there's something I want to ask you. A favor, really."

She waits for me to continue.

"About what I said, while we were there, and about how I thought that no one was coming for me, they don't need to know that."

"You thought no one was coming for you?" Beckett's voice comes from behind me.

Shoot.

I drop my head slowly, working up the courage to face her.

When I finally do, her face is covered with guilt.

"Beckett, that's not what I meant."

"Really?" She scoffs. "Then what did you mean?"

I wrack my brain, looking for any other meaning to what I said.

"I-I..."

Nada.

"I told you, I promised you I would always come for you! Why don't you believe me?"

"It-I-I do!"

"Obviously not! I would do anything for you."

"Detective Beckett, she's been through a lot." Alexis says to her.

"Alexis can you give us a minute?"

Alexis looks at me.

"Yeah, I'll be okay." I mumble.

She walks out unwillingly, I can tell.

"Why did you think no one was going to come for you?"

"Umm because I was in Paris!" I start to get angry.

"I don't care if you were in a war zone in Afghanistan I would have been there!"

"I know that! I know, but you didn't come did you? You didn't. And I knew you wouldn't because I thought they were asking for ransom. No one was going to pay for me, we both know that. Castle would've paid everything he had for Alexis, and no one would've had anything left for me. I know you were trying to find us. I just thought by the time you found me it would've been too late. I made Alexis promise she would leave without me."

"We would've figured something out Samantha!"

"Beckett, can we not talk about this? Please? I just got back, I don't want to fight."

She nods.

"Come here." She holds out her arms and I hug her.

She kisses me on the forehead.

"You know if you get kidnapped again you gotta at least talk to me the day before. I haven't seen you in so long." I almost hear her tears.

"I know. I'm sorry."

When Beckett leaves we eat dinner.

Alexis eats like there's no tomorrow, which makes me sad. She was probably hungry while we were gone, and she still offered me her food.

I don't eat much, I pick at my dinner, spreading it around my plate to make it look like I ate more than I did.

Martha is talking to Alexis the whole time, about whatever. The subject keeps changing.

I'm mostly silent, but I can feel Castle's eyes on me all through dinner.

Martha won't let me clean up after we're done, she and Castle tell both Alexis and I to go to bed.
I don't argue, and neither does Alexis.

I change and brush my teeth and get into bed. I don't wait to say goodnight to anyone.

I wake to someone whispering my name next to me.

I let out a small scream until a hand grabs me and covers my mouth.

"Ssh!" Alexis shushes me.

I close my mouth and she lets go.

"Alexis? What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry I scared you, I just had a bad dream about you and I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Yeah I'm okay. I'm fine."

She sits on my bed.

"Tell me what happened in your dream. It'll make you feel better."

The moonlight throws a glow across her face, illuminating her features when she moves to the right position.

"I had to leave you. I kept my promise but as I was leaving, as I was leaving you screamed so I turned around and they...they shot you."

Tears fall from her cheeks.

I take her hand.

"It wasn't real Alexis. We're alive. We're alright."

She hugs me, crying softly into my hair.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you."

"You did protect me, you kept me sane in there. I was scared out of my mind, and you calmed me down. You did protect me in there. And how you managed to get me ice I have no idea."

We both start laughing.

"I think they were scared of you honestly."

She shrugs, but her smile fades.

"Can I stay with you?"

I nod. We both lay down, and I'm asleep before my head hits the pillow.