Castle's partner

I'm Sorry

"I'll give you a ride, I don't want you to be walking around in the dark. And don't even bother trying to argue because I know you will."

"Lanie!" I whine.

"Do you have a death wish?" She asks. I glare at her.

I get out of the car at the precinct and wave goodbye to Lanie.

"Baby girl?"

She calls out the window.

"Yeah Lanie?" I lean against the driver door so we are face to face.

"You know you can talk to me?"
She strokes my cheek.

"Of course I know that Lanie."

I take her hand in mine.

"You know you're the only one I told about Oliver? It took a while for everyone else to find out."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Sometimes it's hard for me to talk to people. I never tell anyone anything, and I hate asking for help. I lied to you guys for nine months about what happened to my family. I never meant to hurt anyone I just, I didn't know how to tell you. I'm so sorry."

"Samantha, you don't have to be sorry. Ok? I love you no matter what."

"I love you too."

I hug her through the open space.

I take the stairs up to the homicide floor, wanting to delay this meeting for as long as possible.

As soon as I turn the corner from the stairs Espo sees me.

"Oh thank God." He throws his arms around me.

"Stop scaring me Chica!"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

When he sees the hurt look on my face, his softens.

"Hey look at me. You don't have to apologize ok? I'm not mad, just worried. Do you realize how much you apologize for things you don't need to?"

"I-I'm sorry."

"Chica!"

I bite my lip and look at the ground, resisting the urge to apologize again.

"Why do you do that?"

I shrug.

He takes my hands, letting me know it's ok to tell him.

"I used to think saying sorry would make Brandon stop. Every time I did even the smallest thing and he didn't like it, he would hit me Uncle Espo."

His eyes flash in fury.

"Bastard. I'll kill him."

He starts walking, and I know where he's headed.

"Espo no!" I pull him, trying to get him to stop. But he's on a mission.

"Beckett!" I scream, hoping she hears me.

"Espo please don't do this!"

I pull on his arm again, but this time he yanks away. Hard.

I fly against the wall, my neck snapping backward from the impact.

I hit the floor, knees first, and struggle to stand back up.

I grab at the wall, desperately searching for something to hold onto when someone rushes past me.

I hear Beckett's voice down the hall, my vision is disorienting.

"Javi! You need to calm down. I'm just as mad as you are but it's not going to do any good. What would happen to Samantha? Her uncle gets thrown in jail for the rest of his life? And you know her, she would blame herself! If you won't do it for me, do it for her."

"He caused her to be like this! It's his fault! Do you see the pain she's in?"

"I know, I know. Remember Vincit Omnia Veritas."

I hear him exhale.

"Truth conquers all. Kate, look at me and promise he's going away."

"I promise."

And I'm suddenly in someone's arms.

Ryan is supporting me as I put my hand on the wall.

"Are you ok?"

I nod, hoping it's the correct Ryan out of the three I see.

"Let's go sit you down."

He picks me up and carries me into the break room and lays me on the couch.

"What set him off?" He asks after closing the door.

"You ask him."

"Ask me what?" Espo's voice rings out, and I all but fly out of my spot.

I don't think he realizes what he did, and I want it to stay that way.

I feel a small lump forming on the back of my head. I need ice.

"I'll be right back."

I stand up shakily and start my quest.

I brush my fingertips along everything as I walk, hoping it keeps me from falling.

I wander around not really thinking.

"Samantha are you ok?" Castle's voice asks.

"Ice. Can you help me find ice?"

He briskly walks to the first aid kit and takes out an instant ice pack, snaps it, shakes it, and hands it to me.

I gratefully take it from him.

"Thank you."