EIGHTEEN

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" i think this is happy

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" i think this is happy. i think this sad. i think this is laughing. i think this is glad . "




NEEDED ME
*
MOON SHOES ● RAVYN LENAE





My mother's face watched me as i walked around her parent's home. Her home. Indiyah was in our room unpacking and getting dressed into warmer clothes. Orion and Natasiya had gone out to meet with they're wedding decorater before taking us all skiing. We were going to meet them there.

I gently brushed my fingers over the framed pictures of my mother. She had been beautiful. Her smile embodied so much joy and light that any tense situation would be resolved the moment she flashed her teeth. It was identical to Iva's when my sister's rare occasions of not scowling dropped and she showed genuine emotion.

"Dominick have you seen my airpod case?" Iva came down in winter boots and a white puffer jacket. "What are you doing-" her eyes landed on the picture of our mother in my hands. She slowly reached out for it as if she was scared the picture would reject being held by her.

"She was so beautiful." My younger sister breathed. I nodded. The whole house had pictures of my mother and Natasiya and Ludmil's mother.

"You and your mother look so much alike." My gradfather stood by the staircase watching us.

Iva flinched at his voice. "Shit sorry i can put it-"

"Why are you sorry Ivelina that is your mother."

"I'm sorry im just not used to seeing so much of her." Iva's eyes were glossy with unshed tears. My sister never cried. My grandfather came towards us. He was almost as tall as i was. We were a generally tall family.

"This is your home. This was your mother's home and it is our home." My grandfather cupped my sisters face in his hands. "Never apologise for missing her. She was a memorable soul. And she lives on."

I don't ever think I've seen my gradfather with a frown on his face when the topic was about my mother. Her presence was alive here. She wasn't gone. I believed it,my grandparents believed it and I knew Iva did to.She

Nikolai gasped from the staircase. "Is the Ivelina Ruslana crying? The world must be coming to an end."

Iva wiped away her tears with her shirt sleeves. "Fuck you."

"Oh you'd love that." Nikolai winked.

Iva choked out a laugh and flipped him off. Nikolai laughed back. The door opened and Natasiya hopped in on one barefoot and one silver stilleto.

My grandmother placed cookies on a cooling tray on the kitchen island.

Nikolai and Killian sped into the kitchen to get one. Killian arrived first but Nikolai pushed Killian into a stool. They'd been doing this for years. Everytime we came here as children you'd have to get the cookies before Killian or Nikolai did or else they'd be gone in a split second.

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