Glacial

40

I've come to realize,morning begins early in the Sheeran house.

"Ed, its your turn" I mumbled half asleep as my eyes cracked open, revealing the time. "what's the time?" Ed yawned sleepily, turning to me. "its four" I said, "they're getting trying" I added and Ed chuckled huskily, his morning voice making me melt. "fine then" he said and he flipped the covers, purposely making me cold. "oi!" I squealed, pulling the blanket back over me quickly, trapping in any heat that may be left.

I heard Ed lazily stomp across the hall, and the door of the nursery opened. I heard him whisper to them, rather loudly to be exact. "lets go see mummy" he said and I heard his heavy footsteps coming back to the bedroom. I flicked on the lamp, but I remained laying down, Ed came in carrying both girls and he placed Iris on top of me, climbing back into the bed with Stella. "you two are so trying" I yawned groggily and Stella turned to me, giving me a cheeky gummy smile. " I think they're getting teeth" I added as iris bit my finger, I drew it out immediately and had to restrain myself from cursing. " probably why they wake so early" Ed said and I nodded, I could feel myself drifting back off to sleep.

Ed managed to get Stella back to sleep by patting her bottom while she lay on his chest, and I just couldn't get iris to sleep. "Ed i'll put Stells back to bed, you put this one to sleep" I said, getting up and laying Iris in my place on the bed. "sure" he said and he gently placed Stella in my arms, before taking the little trouble maker out of bed and rested her on his chest. I walked down the hall carefully, trying not to move to much. I walked into the nursery and placed Stella back in her bed and I watched as she wriggled around to get comfortable. I closed the door, not fully, and dragged myself back to the room. I met Ed halfway, who had managed to get Iris to sleep in all of two minutes. I felt kind of useless, I mean, I was their mum but they wouldn't sleep for me, what am I going to do when Ed tours?

"you alright?" Ed whispered, he must've noticed my facial expression. " yeah, just tired" I said and I pushed past him, making my way back to bed where I rolled over so Ed couldn't see my face when he comes back. I felt my eyes burning with tears threatening to show, I blinked them back but I knew it wouldn't be long until they spilled over. Ed came in and he slumped into bed, laying on his back, as close to me as he could get. I sniffed in and Ed instantly came closer, so her was practically on top of me. "whats up?" he whispered and I shook my head, "nothing" I mumbled. "whatever, tell me" he said demandingly, pulling me onto my back. "no" I said and I rolled back so I wasn't facing him, "i want to sleep" I muttered grumpily. "Lan-"Ed started  "shut up!" I yelled, I got up and stomped out of the room. "lanie!" Ed called after me, but I didn't answer.

I stood in the living room for a few minutes before I heard Ed stomping down the hall. I looked at the door and ran for it, grabbing my coat off the hanger as I walked out, closing the door as quietly as I could on my way out. the cold morning air hit me like a ton of bricks as I stepped onto the pavement. It was getting light outside now, as it was now five in the morning. I breathed out loudly as I began walking, I don't know where im going to go. I walked out of the street at record speed and I slowed down once I reached the main road, there were people out walking their dogs already, so at least I wasn't out alone I guess. I wandered down the road, taking my hair out of the bun I was wearing and putting it in a simple pony tail as I walked. since I didn't know where I was walking, I was surprised to find myself at the park. I walked over to a swing in the center of the playground and sat on it, the seat was cold and it made my butt numb. I gently swung back and forth, letting my head think about what ever it wanted to think about.

I didn't take my phone, and Ed would have tried to ring me by now. The clock tower says it is 6:12am, I had been here for a good hour already. Today is February twenty second, it has been a year today since I was trapped under rubble in Christchurch. A year since I met my Idol, a year since I lost my big bother Sam, and a year since James came into mine and Ed's life as a shy toddler. All those things swum around in my head and I felt tears flow down my face, not out of anger, but out of gratefulness.  I am happy that I am able to have Ed in my life, im happy that I have three beautiful kids and that I have a nice house and nice things, but at the same time, im devastated that I don't have Mum and Sam with me to share these moments.

I stood up from the swing and I started walk back to the house rather absentmindedly. i didn't know if I was ready to go home, but im sure Ed would be worried about me, and he means more than anything to me. as I began to walk, i felt the air around me become warmer as the sun came up, the light blinded me and i felt warm, warm like i was in the tight embrace of my brother.

* * * *

Hey,

Excuse the last part of this terrible chapter, i had no idea what to write, its just a filler for now..

thanks to everyone who reads this, please comment if you like it, i wanna know how many people actually are enjoying it!

GUESS WHAT

THERE IS ONLY FIVE CHAPTERS LEFT TILL THE SEQUEL!

WOOOOH!

yeah so next chapter i will reveal the name!

~~

Vote, comment

see yah

~Annie xx