War Upon the Sunrise | HS Side Story

Chapter Fourteen

Two weeks passed like a strike of a lightning. So far, the company is somehow doing well on its own. My parents were the happiest about the performance of the company. And seeing them joyful with the result makes me feel the satisfaction of being a daughter.

“You should get some rest some time, Lucy. The company's doing fine now. You should take care of yourself too,” Mom told me while I was busy watering my newly bought vegetables on my tiny garden at the backyard.

She was holding a tray beside me. The tray is filled with sandwiches she made for me.

It's Saturday, so I took some time to rest. And yet here is my mother telling me to have some rest even though I am already resting at the moment.

“Mom, don't you find this resting already?” I asked, holding a sprinkler, watering my still tiny lettuce.

She sighed beside me. “What I meant about it is to take a leave from work, Lucy. I know you've been through a lot within one month and more, and it is all because of the mess in the company. You're regaining the company's stake instead of trying to regain the life you've lost.” She sighed once again. “And it's embarrassing that we let you handle the company immediately when in fact this is not the industry you're used to. More embarrassing is of the fact that I and your Dad were not able to fix it on our own when in fact we were the reason behind all of these.”

I turned to her and stopped from watering my tiny vegetables. “I told you many times already, Mom, I am fine being in the company. Besides, Nikoel is with me all the time which made it easier for me. And don't blame yourself for the bankruptcy of the company because it was never your fault if the people inside it chose to leave.” I paused. “You can never force people to stay, Mom. And that's the truth.”

She became silent. After I lived with them here, slowly I saw how she kept on blaming herself for the fall of the Miller's. She was taking the blame for it, thinking that she was the reason why Phaebe left.

I asked her once before, probably weeks ago.

“Mom, if Phaebe didn't left on her own, would you let her stay?” I asked her.

She's busy slicing the tuna that she's going to cook for dinner.

She paused from slicing. Seconds later, she continued. “If she didn't left, I would have said 'sorry'.”

I went silent. I was holding a knife, trying to slice some onions. I looked at her. She's standing on my side, at the back of the counter.

“What do you mean?” I asked in a tiny voice.

I want to know what she meant by that. Would she let Phaebe stay? Or would she push her away?

She remained silent for a second. She continued slicing, then she suddenly talked. “I would have told her my apologies. I would have let her stay. I would have been a mother to her. Because I never was.”

My heart went wild. I felt an ache from the depth of its arteries.

I don't know why I felt that way. Maybe, out of jealousy.

Because if I have to be honest with myself, I had always been jealous with Phaebe. She's living the life I supposed to have. She married the man who promised me marriage. She's like an angel in disguise for everyone around her. And Lucas fell in love with her.

She's loved.

I wanted to blame her for existing. Because all the things she have was supposed to be mine.

I sighed and took a sandwich on the tray she is holding. I took a bite on it. “Stop thinking about things too much, Mom. I am happy with where I am right now. Don't blame yourself. You're just hurting yourself with that.”