Just Once// Sidemen Fanfiction

Chapter 17// Update Vlog

"Alright, so hey guys!" Alice began to stream. She was only doing a short stream in the hallway of the flat building so the boys wouldn't know where she was. "This is sort of an update vlog slash stream. If you didn't see Harry's tweet yesterday, yes, I am no longer dating Vik. I've moved out of the sidemen house because I felt like such a waste of space there, and I didn't want to disturb anyone else there. So that's why I am no longer going to be on twitch or Instagram or twitter. I'm going to disappear." Alice began to cry.

"Honestly, I should just die. I fuck everything up. Everything I do is a major fuck up. Really, this isn't my fault. This is Vik's fault." Alice was experiencing mood swings. She didn't know why, though.

"That's it. I'm done with this stream. Goodbye forever." After she logged out of twitch, she deactivated her Twitter and posted a goodbye photo to instagram. She wasn't joking when she said she was disappearing.

"Harry!" She called, walking into the flat.

"What is it Alice?" Harry came out of his room.

"Here's your laptop. I'm going for a walk."

"Okay, come back soon."

"Alright."

Alice left the flat with her phone and jacket in hand. She walked down to the main road, and stopped at the corner of the street.

Words ran through her head;

Stupid.

Worthless.

Liar.

It's true, she was all of those things. She couldn't handle it anymore. She was going to kill herself.

Carefully, she took a step out into the street, then another, until she was in direct line of a car. She took one last deep breath, and braced for impact. The car hit her without hesitation. She felt nothing.

Almost immediately, she woke up. She was in the backyard of their parents old house. Josh was running around, only six years old, with a paper hat and a plastic sword. Alice was sitting on the porch with her mother, eating a watermelon.

"Alice, go play with Josh!" Her mother, young and beautiful, said.

"Okay mom." She jumped off the porch, instantly falling into a black hole. She felt so free, like she didn't have any cares in the world.

She fell into another scene. Josh was at his locker in high school, chatting up some chick Alice didn't know.

"Come on Josh. I need to get home." Alice rolled her eyes.

"Hold on Alice!" He shouted at her. "Sorry. That's my sister Alice. She's not important."

'She's not important'

Alice was taken into yet another scene. She was outside of her body this time. Her body was placed in a casket. Josh was standing over her, in a suit, tears streaming down his face.

"Alice you were the most important girl in my life. I can't believe you just ended yourself." Josh could barely look at the lifeless body any longer. He ripped his gaze away and stared at the floor.

But then, Alice woke up. She was in a hospital bed. Tubes and wires all attached to her body.

She tiredly looked to her left. Harry and Josh sat there leaning on eachother. Asleep. Josh's hand was gripping hers. To her right, Simon and Vik. Also asleep.

"Jo-Jos-Josh." Alice managed to whisper, shaking his arm.

"Alice?" He drearily asked, stirring from his sleep.

"Josh?"

"Alice!" Josh yelled, causing Alice's heart rate to jump. "Sorry..."

"Josh? Josh-"

"I'm so glad your awake. It's been a while."

"Ho-how long?" Alice placed her hand on her forehead. Her head was throbbing with pain.

"A week. Today is Saturday." That had to have been the reason Vik was there.

"Saturday." Alice repeated.

"Yeah, we've all been worried sick! Why would you try to end yourself like that?" Josh furrowed his eyebrows.

"Vik? Vik was worried?"

"Of course he was! While you were out... He-he explained to us how much of a mistake he made, and how stupid he'd been for not letting you tell your side of the story. He misses you."

"Oh." All Alice could think to say was that, so many thoughts were running through her head, she had no clue what to think anymore.

"I'm glad your awake, Alice."

"I'm glad you're here." Alice smiled at her brother, she was so happy to have a brother like him to lean on.

"The rest of the boys will be up soon," Josh said, checking his watch, "They all have alarms set for six to see if you've woken up."

"What time is it now?" Alice asked, rubbing her eyes to see if she could read the small clock above the door.

"It's 5:59 actually." Josh laughed.

"Awesome. Do the other boys come into the hospital often?"

"Ethan does, but JJ is super busy and Tobi lives semi-far from the rest of us."

"Oh, good. I need to talk to everyone when their here."

"Alright."

Just then, a bunch of phones went off. The boys alarms rang.

Simon was the first to officially open his eyes, followed closely by Harry and Vik. They all stared at Alice in shock.

"Morning boys." She flashed them a smile.

"Alice!" Harry smiled, jumping up to give her a hug.

"Hi Harold."

"I'm so glad your awake!" He cheered, sitting back down in his seat.

"Uh, if you guys don't mind, I'd like to speak with Vik, alone for a minute." Alice interrupted their reunion.

"Sure, we'll be right outside." The boys filed out of the room, minis Vik.

"So, Vik. I heard about what you've been saying while I was out and I just wante-"

"Alice I am so fucking sorry for everything that I've ever done to you. I love you so much, and I never wanted to hurt you. I was just pissed because I thought I was going to lose you..." Vik sounded so sad to Alice, so she didn't say anything, she just reached out for his hand, and pulled him so he was standing over her.

"Vikram, I love you more than you could ever imagine. I was never planning on leaving you. I'm not going anywhere unless it's with you. You're my babe, and I'd be nothing without you." She pulled him down and kissed him. "I love you."

"I missed you so much..." Vik sighed as he put his hand through Alice's hair.

"It's safe to say I missed you more. I mean, I did walk out into traffic for you..." She laughed.

"Never, ever, do that again! When I got the panicked phone call from your brother when I was in Florida I flew straight home. I had to make sure you were okay, even if we weren't dating anymore."

"Well, I'm glad you did."