Love on the brain

Change your life

6 weeks later

I just finished writing my exam, last paper. I walked out with Kedi and she invited me to Tshepang's birthday party. "Girl what dick is you riding that got you glowing like that?" She asked and I laughed. "Kabelo's" I joked. "Bitch you know he's never" and we carried on laughing but it somehow triggered me, not as much but it did.

I haven't told the rest of my friends about my pregnancy and I won't for now. I have a doctor's appointment and I need to tell Kabelo about my pregnancy. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets mad at me like I did, I'm just doing this so he doesn't hear it from someone else.

"Girl imma go to the bathroom, I'll see you later on" I said and she dapped me up before she left. I watched her leave and went to Jermaine's car cause he was waiting for me there. "Hey" I said as I sat comfortably and kissed him. He looked at me get comfortable and I asked him what's wrong. "Nothing" he said and I scrunched my face.

We drove out and got on the way to our doctor. "Babe? You've been quiet" I said as I observed him. He looked so angry, like I did something wrong. "She wants to take Gabby away" he said softly. "Why?" I asked and he sighed with defeat. "I broke up with her and she wants to move away" he said. "She wants to go to Cape Town with my baby" he said and I could hear it in his voice. "I'm sorry baby" I said as I rubbed the back of his neck.

"I don't know what I'm gonna do" he said as he rubbed his chin. I held his hand and he tightened his grip. We continued driving in silence until we got to the doctor. Once we got out he held my hand and walked me to the doctor's office.

"Good morning, Naledi. Congratulations on your pregnancy!" Dr Moyo said as she smiled at us. "Thank you, doctor" feeling nervous and a mix of emotions. Jermaine gripped my hand tightly. Dr Moyo checked my vitals and asked me about my routine. Jermaine listened intently, his eyes never leaving mine.

She instructed me to lie down on the bed so she can do my first ultrasound. Jermaine stood at the end of the bed while I fidgeted with my fingers, not knowing what to expect. "Ready for your first ultrasound Naledi?" The doctor asked me and I nodded, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness.

Dr Moyo applied the gel on my abdomen and put the ultrasound transducer. On the monitor, a fuzzy, unclear image appeared. Dr Moyo moved the transducer around and suddenly, a tiny flickering heartbeat materialised.

I saw Jermaine cover his mouth is surprise and tears welling up in his eyes. "That's your baby's heartbeat" Dr Moyo announced and I found myself crying tears of joy. I'm growing a baby in my belly.

"Everything looks perfect," she assured us. "Your baby is around 10 weeks old and the heartbeat is strong." She said and I breathed in relief. Jermaine winked at me before asking for a picture. She printed some out and we walked out of the office, with smiles on our face.

"Our little miracle" he said and I corrected him. "Our love" I said as he opened the door for me. Jermaine wrapped his arms around me, holding me close before I got into the car. "I love you mama" he said and I smiled, feeling the butterflies, "I love you too" I replied before getting in the car. We sat in the car and cherished this special moment.

"I think I'm ready to tell my dad" I said to him and he looked at me with a concerned expression. "Are you sure?" He asked and I nodded. I was confident to tell my dad about him and then I'll tell my mom after.

We drove back home and he parked on the drive way. I kissed him before he got out to open for me. I'm so nervous, I can feel my knees buckling up and my head feeling light again. My breathing got faster and my heart was racing with the breathing, I felt like I'm hyperventilating. "Babe, calm down" he said as I stumbled while getting out. Now I'm not sure if I really want to do it.

I got in the house first and I saw him sitting down on the couch and my sister was standing in the kitchen. " hey dad" I said nervously and he smiled. "Hey Ntombi" he said as I gave him a hug. I'm jumping straight to it, I thought. "I have someone I'd like you to meet" I said as I signalled him to come in. Luckily, he looked good, he smelt good and he wasn't intoxicated in any way.

"Afternoon sir" Jermaine humbled himself before shaking my dad's hand. My dad's face changed and he got serious. "Daddy, this is my boyfriend, Jermaine" I said, trying to sound firm. His eyes narrowed at Jermaine. "Jermaine? From where?" He said with his voice low and measured. "Jermaine Sage, my mom is from America, she relocated here for work when I was 5." I scrunched my face slightly but not to much so my dad doesn't think I didn't know, but I really didn't know.

"Oh interesting, what about your dad?" He asked and Jermaine's body tensed up, "I don't know who my father is" he said firmly and my dad nodded. "It happens" he said in Zulu. "What are your intentions with my daughter?" He asked nonchalantly, expecting to hear a good response. "To love her, protect her and provide for her and... nurture her" he said, not saying what he wanted to say.

"How old are you? What do you do for a living?" My dad asked and I started shaking. "I'm 26, I'm a lecturer, civil engineer by qualification" he said and my dad smiled. "That's good, that's a good field to be in, but you're old for my daughter!" He said with his face going back to being serious. "Where do you stay? How did you guys meet?" He asked and I couldn't stop shaking. Jermaine put his hand on my knee so I could calm down and my dad looked at his hand but he didn't flinch.

"I live in Midrand, we met at the Sandton Library, she was fighting with somebody in the library and I was in a team's meeting so I had to intervene." He said and I smiled at his lie. "That sounds about right" my dad said as he stood up and shook his hand. "It's nice to meet you Jermaine" he said and I smiled before dropping the news on him

"Daddy there's something else." I said taking a deep breath. My dad's expression turned curious. "What is it?" He asked and Jermaine held my hand tightly, offering support. I don't think he understands that this physical contact is going to backfire on me, this is a Zulu man. "I'm pregnant" I blurted out softly, looking down at my feet and the room fell silent.

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How do you think Mr Dlamini is going to react to this?