63. protect myself

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As I'm lying on my bed, I stare at the ceiling, feeling empty

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As I'm lying on my bed, I stare at the ceiling, feeling empty. I don't have anyone to spend time with while I'm here, and truthfully, I don't think anyone would want to spend time with me anyway.

I think about what happened today with Michelle and how I was able to say no to her. It felt good in the moment, despite being really scary, but now I can't stop thinking about it and wondering whether I made the right choice.

I talked to my mom about coming home, and she was extremely disappointed in me. She told me that I should accept Michelle's offer, and if I don't, I'll disappoint her. Everything is all just too confusing, and it's getting too much for me.

Michelle still won't tell me if Grace is okay. She came to visit me after what happened, and I begged her to give me an answer. She wouldn't tell me, and she almost seemed to enjoy the fact that I was worried.

Truthfully, I'm scared of Michelle. I'm scared that if I don't do what she wants me to, she'll hurt me.

I walk over to the set of drawers on the opposite side of my room. I then open the top drawer, searching through my clothes to find something important. I pull out a small pocket knife that I'd managed to conceal inside my suitcase.

I take a moment to look at it. I can't imagine actually having to use it, but if someone was about to hurt me, I would have no choice. But I don't even know how to use a knife. I can barely hold it correctly.

I heard arguing outside my room earlier. I thought it sounded like Summer's voice but I couldn't hear clearly. There was a lot of commotion, but then it went away after some time.

Suddenly, I hear a knocking sound coming from outside my room, followed by arguing. I furrow my eyebrows as I listen to it as I become curious as to what's going on out there. This time, I hear a male voice.

Hesitantly, I unlock my door, peering through a small crack that I'm able to make. I scan the hallway, and my eyes immediately find the source of the arguing...

Standing a few feet away from me is Jones. He's stood in the doorway of his room, talking to a female outside the room. Her body is covered in black clothing, the hood of her sweatshirt pulled over her head. I'm able to make out a lock of brunette hair emerging from her hood.

I watch the altercation play out. He seems really stressed, and she isn't backing down. And then my eyes widen in shock when I watch him hand over a gun to her. She quickly pushes it inside her pocket, and I begin to panic.

And that's when I see her, and my heart drops...

I reach my hand into my pocket, clasping onto the knife. And when he closes the door, I step foot out of my room, wanting to confront her.

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