"Her or me?" A tear rolled down Michelle's puffy cheek, "You have to make a decision."
For Michelle, life has always been about control-control in the studio, in her friendships, and even in the secrets she hides. But with an unexpected pregnancy...
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Today is the day I get to perform with A-troupe, and I'm so excited. I've been working so hard, and I think that I'm actually starting to fit in here. Although I'm trying not to get too comfortable, as my position on the team is far from permanent.
I wish that they'd just give me a chance, though. I know that I'm young and slightly immature, but I know that with time I can catch up to the other girls.
I look over at the girls as they try on their outfits, getting ready for the night.
"Get the fuck off of me!" Lily shouts at Amy, laughing hysterically.
"Amy! If you ruin my makeup, I swear to god I will kill you!"
I watch as Amy wipes her hand across Lily's face, making her extremely angry. I can't help but giggle as I watch them messing around. I really wish that I could get involved, but none of the girls want me here.
"You fuck- fucking bitch!" Lily grabs her hair tightly, followed by laughter from the both of them.
I'm instantly snapped out of my thoughts when I feel a presence behind me.
"Hey, you feeling ready for tonight?" I hear Summer's voice.
I turn around. "Umm- umm, yeah. I mean, I guess."
She can tell that I'm nervous. "Hey, don't stress about it, it's all going to be okay. Plus, I'm here to look out for you, alright? If you need someone to talk to, then just come right over."
"That would be great!" I smile gratefully.
"Good. Now stop looking so worried and put a smile on your face. I don't like seeing you like this."
She rests her hand underneath my chin, tilting my head upwards slightly.
"Where's that smile? I don't see it."
I smile.
"That's much better." She takes her hand off my chin.
I then decide to ask her a question. "Are- are you not nervous?"
She nods. "Of course I am. I mean, they say that with time your nerves don't get to you as much, but I just don't think that's true. I mean, how are we supposed to not get nervous when we have Michelle on our backs all the time."
"Totally!" I understand what she's talking about.
"This is not even close to internationals, yet I'm still shitting myself," She says.
She realises that she's cussed in front of me. "Shi– crapping myself, I meant."
"You can curse in front of me, I'm not a kid. Plus, my mom and dad do it all the time," I reassure her.
"Alright then." She winks. "Just don't tell Emily; she would kill me. The rule is that you can't say bad words in front of the J-troupers."
"Little does she know they say them all the time themselves." I let her know that the J-troupers are far from innocent.
